I miss the good old days, when 'hate crime' meant nothing worse than bouncing a watermelon off a trampoline onto a black man's car

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Comments (93)

  • Clement Dickens Reply

    I miss the good old 2v2 -apemom days

  • Elsa Gusikowski Reply

    Okay, you win. I miss the old days. :P

  • Alize Leuschke Reply

    :( I miss the good old days.

  • Kelvin Keebler Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Leone Jenkins Reply

    I miss the good old days :/

  • Lorenza Hand Reply

    My 22 month old has always had the hardest time napping! The past 2 months he's decided naps are for babies and he only naps 4 days a week. When he does, though it's for 3 hours and after he loses those huge dark circles he's started getting. I make him be in his crib for an hour when he seems like he's tired but half the time he just uses the bed like a trampoline. Problem is, when he gets tired he just gets more energetic and impulsive instead of looking tired and always has. He's a really well behaved and coordinated boy usually but when he's tired he starts throwing things and getting accident prone. We need these naps!

  • Diego Greenholt Reply

    Huh. I hate watermelon :(

  • Renee Bartoletti Reply

    Such as a longer locomotive name? I miss the good old days of 'SD40-2' :D

  • Jolie Glover Reply

    I miss the old days too.

  • Simeon Thompson Reply

    I miss the good old days when case hardends actually sold xD

  • Bethany Veum Reply

    Q: A black man, a Mexican and a Muslim are crusing down the street in a car. Who's driving? A: The cop. Q: What do you say to a black man in a three piece suit? A: "Will the defendent please rise..."

  • Breana Balistreri Reply

    I miss the good old Lyon days :(

  • Giles Sauer Reply

    Oh the good old days :) I miss the 90's.

  • Jadyn Herman Reply

    I owned a black '83 5.0 back in the 90's. I loved that car. I would not deal with it though man. There are better cars to mess with.

  • Carroll Rohan Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Loma Rogahn Reply

    Black man driving a nice car = bad guy, is not an example of deductive reasoning. It's confirmation bias.

  • Kamryn Sauer Reply

    Ahh, the good old days of Malcolm's blog. I miss that.

  • Dan Ward Reply

    3/10 Title 8/10 The Office gif

  • Axel Zemlak Reply

    I hate watermelons but love anything watermelon flavored.

  • Toney Witting Reply

    i miss the old duke nukem days

  • Cora Waelchi Reply

    Ahh the good old days, how I will miss you! :(

  • Ignacio Pfeffer Reply

    I miss the old days of paint.

  • Aida Dickens Reply

    I miss the good old days of Trump memes :(

  • Bud Hackett Reply

    I hate watermelon absolute worst possible fruit.

  • Margarette Bartell Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Richmond Kutch Reply

    I miss the good old days...

  • Ardella Will Reply

    I miss the good old BF2 mod days :(

  • Jermey Skiles Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Agustina Price Reply

    i miss the good old days

  • Hollis Heathcote Reply

    I'm black and I hate watermelon.

  • Antonia Schimmel Reply

    WCB 2010 Terminator marathoning... I miss the good old days

  • Elliott Toy Reply

    I miss the old days XD

  • Darius Gislason Reply

    I hate Watermelon, Licorice, and Beer.

  • Ashly Kreiger Reply

    God, how I miss the good old days...*puts head in hands*

  • Haskell DuBuque Reply

    It was in Chiraq. A few days before, a black guy drove up to a white couples car on an express way and shot into it, killing the man and wounding the woman. That's why I added it.

  • Darrion Rogahn Reply

    Standard 12 bar blues with country vocals: Drivin' to the movies, Black Velvet in my hand, look into the rear view, and I'm starin' down the man. "License, registration, come on step out of the car." Now my right to remain silent's got me strandin' behind the bars

  • Novella Abbott Reply

    Man, that's hilarious. I expect Benny Hill to pop out of a car wearing a black fur ushanka.

  • Aiden Farrell Reply

    God I miss the good old days with Guns and Roses

  • Kitty Pfannerstill Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Sheila Franecki Reply

    *A black man was killed in a horrible car accident the other day. What's funny about that?* Nothing, he was my friend. (Followed up by sassy look)

  • Joel Denesik Reply

    Now THIS is glorious. I miss the good old days.

  • Tatyana Wolf Reply

    I miss the good old days of Nuuvem.

  • Orlo Hamill Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Uriel Bartell Reply

    You know how I know you're racist? It's because you just called a black man sitting in his car sketchy.

  • Denis Murray Reply

    Instead of a seat you could use something like the Galt Nest. This is by far the most used baby toy of all time in our house. My 2.5 year old has used it pretty much daily since she was 5 months old. It is perfect for the just starting to sit phase. Now she uses it as a target to throw balls into, or a trampoline when she turns it upside down haha. I have tried to put it into storage so many times.

  • Demetrius Rempel Reply

    Sighhhh, I miss the good old days!

  • Emmett Gulgowski Reply

    I hate to see a waste of good watermelon.

  • Freida Goyette Reply

    Watermelon. I hate it!

  • Keyshawn Dooley Reply

    I hate watermelon.

  • Stephen Weber Reply

    I hate watermelon.

  • Shane Langosh Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Dario Collier Reply

    Ya man that's why I like it! I was tossed between silver and gunmetal this is almost perfect for a black car!

  • Devonte Jenkins Reply

    I HATE WATERMELON

  • Adriel Stehr Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Johnathan Green Reply

    I miss true old days of circle

  • Jennifer Kreiger Reply

    I miss the good old days of snooPING AS usual.

  • Favian Hahn Reply

    Ahhh I miss the good old Man of Smiles days.

  • Alana Hansen Reply

    I miss those old peaceful EN days.

  • Irving Mraz Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Mathilde Hegmann Reply

    Makes me miss the good old "hanging chad" days.

  • Edythe Keebler Reply

    I miss the old days :'(

  • Ashlee Macejkovic Reply

    I miss the good old days of May.

  • Estelle Yost Reply

    I too miss the good old days (or at least the end of them)

  • Davion Bogisich Reply

    What black man doesn't want to steal am I right? What Jew doesn't want to trick me out of my money? What Asian can actually drive a car? No. Stop. That's discrimination and it's fucking bullshit.

  • Ally Christiansen Reply

    A black man would not do this to his son's car. In fact, I would argue that no other person would do this. Again, check yo privilege. Also you're boring. I'm done with you.

  • Rafael Hermiston Reply

    We live in a cul-de-sac. At first, my spouse and I thought we lucked out with our litter of kids. Nope. Bought it, moved in, and... Would kill for someone to have been able to put a stop to my neighbor painting his house BRIGHT AS FUCK TANGERINE last year. It's 2 stories. The sunlight reflected off of it gives everything within 100 feet of the house, a sort of...orange hue. Yep. Including any room of mine with windows facing it. That's the guy on the right. He and his GF live with his Dad, and the dad's gf, another couple, as well as 2-3 kids I see once in awhile. Their plethora of vehicles either sit rusting in place under tarps stained with a 2-inch, dried, and flaking bird shit...or they zoom those fuckers in and out at 60mph, from the newest sports cars, over-pumped trucks, or motorcycles. Most of the weekends you can find no less than 8 vehicles all belonging to someone in that house. And of course, only 2 fit into their driveway (their garage is full of hoarder's shit, thanks for that view neighbor), so guess where they park the rest? Lining the street, sort of like, outlining the circular street, all parallel to the curb and shit? FUCK. NO. They just park their cars in the middle of the goddamn asphalt. Blocking someone's driveway? Oh, well. Go knock and ask them to move it. Hopefully they'll hear you knock this time. And maybe it'll take less than an hour to be able to get to my house. The people to my left? Lovely family. Met them, and they seemed warm and friendly- also having twins + 1, I was certain they'd have the patience for my kids' Outside Voices over the years. The front of their house has almost no front yard. Which is why I"m sure, it was easy for their upkeep during the time that my house was on the market back them. Because within a month of moving in, my spouse and I drove past their house one day....and noted....the boat on blocks in the driveway. Had we just not seen that? Where did they get that? Next day...a car up on blocks. Next to the boat. Which meant that the cars would need to be parked on the street. That would be 3 cars for them, PLUS the Commercial Vehicle the man uses for his heating and AC repair business. And then....a fw days later....I coulda sworn an old bike shop fell from the sky into their tiny front yard. So many pieces of bikes. And pieces of cars. And the two teens boys? Super nice. As are the many, many boys that also like bikes, bike parts, boats, boat parts, cars, car parts.... And I blame myself for not seeing more about the problems with these neighbors. After we bought the house and moved in, we were inspecting every little inch, and came across a way to peer over the end of our top balcony deck, and directly into the Sanford-And-Son property next door. Fuck. And as we peered into what was clearly a long-time-growing uno yard, complete with everything from broken wicker furniture turned upside down by the fire pit, to the massive, circus-sized trampoline sitting in the middle of the...yard? Is it a yard, if someone just dumped a bunch of sand back there and called it a day? Then the junkyard tossed in on top? Anyway. One look told my wife and I....that the sellers were most likely really fucking clever, and got the neighbors to put up a good front for the sale....cuz after two months....shit. I lower my eyelids just enough to blur the details, as I turn down my street every day. Because while inside my home, and the backyard are absolute paradises....getting there, it's like trekking through Staten Island's Dump to get to it. If you don't give 2 shits about how your choices affect others around you-- HOA is not for you. You'll wanna be as douche-y as possible, without repercussions. HOWEVER....read the fine print in that HOA, if it comes up. It might LITERALLY be the only thing keeping you from purchasing a diamond in a pile of shit.

  • Deja Bashirian Reply

    I miss the Kripp of the old PoE days.

  • Casey Bogan Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Graham Upton Reply

    right, i simply TAPPED the brakes when i realized it was starting to flurry out and black ice could be a potential risk and that's when my car decided to go out of control. scary stuff man.

  • Valentina Conroy Reply

    The good old days, Damn I miss them.

  • Hannah Mueller Reply

    I miss the good old days :(

  • Clinton Bauch Reply

    I miss the old days of WoW!

  • Selina Cronin Reply

    I miss the old days.

  • Clotilde Carter Reply

    Mine is iceworld i miss the good old days

  • Effie Ratke Reply

    God I fucking hate watermelon

  • Watson Feest Reply

    I hate watermelon

  • Glen Cartwright Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Jacquelyn Kozey Reply

    i am so sad right now, really miss the good old days

  • Neoma Boyer Reply

    I miss the good old days when KSI was actualy funny.

  • Riley D'Amore Reply

    I miss the good old days of 1.4 and 1.5

  • Deshawn Purdy Reply

    I miss the old days.

  • Christophe McClure Reply

    I too hate watermelon.

  • Dulce Lynch Reply

    I hate watermelon

  • Angela O'Connell Reply

    “Now, I don’t even feel comfortable driving with a black man in my car. It’s sad,” she said. some oxycontin should soothe her nerves, once its out of the evidence locker.

  • Sammie Trantow Reply

    The good old days, I miss them.

  • Jazlyn Stroman Reply

    What's the "portion principle"? My point about the *Fast and Furious* series is that as long as it focuses on car stunts and action scenes no-one particularly cares about the ethnicity of the actors, *because that's not the point of the movies*. Conversely, Luke Cage's race is an important part of the show because it's a character-driven series about a black man.

  • Vaughn Nienow Reply

    2008 BMW 535xi black on black with limo tint. It's a great full size luxury car with twin turbos that are very responsive to chip tuning. The "juice box" bumps it up to 400hp for just under $600. 1995 Chevy 2500 extended cab pickup. I do man stuff. 1969 beetle chassis with a '29 Mercedes kit on it. My household also includes a 2013 BMW 328xi and a 1996 Jeep Grand Cherokee.

  • Elvera Harris Reply

    How old are you? Is this a newer rule? I took driver's ed 13 years ago, and we were told to get our license and insurance card ready between pulling over and being approached, so when they asked, we were ready to hand it over. Also, my teacher for the class was an early 30s black man, and I was a 15 year old white girl in a diverse car and class. So I can't imagine other groups were told differently.

  • Grant Muller Reply

    When I was about 4 years old, my mom took me to the zoo for the first time and this was the first time I had ever seen a gorilla. Long story short, we're walking to the car from the zoo and a large black man was in the parking lot and I threw a tantrum because "one of the 'lilla's' escaped...

  • Ila Fay Reply

    The good old days, I miss them

  • Florida Durgan Reply

    I miss the good old days.

  • Dolly Braun Reply

    I miss the good old days

  • Gianni O'Conner Reply

    > For round one, Hawking just has to find some way to get above her and ride onto her. Him plus gravity would do lots of damage. Then he just has to continue trampling her until she's dead. He's an emaciated old man in a scooter that weighs probably about 150lbs, for a combined weight of maybe 300lbs. First, he has no way of getting above her and riding onto her. There are no ramps in this empty warehouse scenario. His wheels are not big enough and the scooter's motor isn't powerful enough to knock her down and ride up onto her body, and even if he could do that, he'd have a precarious enough position that even a frail Helen Keller could probably get out from under him. > For round two, he's got a gun, can shoot it, and can see. He's got a gun, can't aim it, probably can't shoot it, and can see. The prompt says he can use his clicker finger but he doesn't have a clicker finger, he uses his computer with eye tracking now. Even if he had a clicker finger, that means he can pull a trigger. I have full use of my body and I doubt I could aim at a small woman bouncing around on a trampoline. > For round three, they just have to meet each other then Hawking moves in lots of circles then stabs her. You're acting like a slow moving rascal wheel chair is some kind of high mobility Iron Man suit. Those scooters go about 4.5mph, which about a slow walking speed. Slowly walk into someone with a knife and it might not even penetrate the skin and they will definitely move away at a faster speed. His wheel chair is on tank treads in this one, so it has very poor turning as well. Once he pokes her she knows where he is and she can just get behind him and strangle him.

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  • black man's car