Bird sleeps where he wants to sleep

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  • MRW I'm a bird just trying to take a nap and some human idiot thinks I'm dead and tries to give me CPR
  • When you sleep through your alarm and someone wakes you up
  • Bird sleeps where he wants to sleep
  • I'm a bird so I sleep where I want
  • How did it end up like that?
  • Are you dead? *poke*
  • Wakey Birdy
  • Startleborb
  • dead bird
  • Bird CPR
  • me irl
  • Awwwtf

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Comments (63)

  • Letha Ebert Reply

    I should have said person/law-initiated physically painful repercussions. Nature does dole out a lot of physical discomfort, yes, which kids do need to be trained on. I'm totally on board with your campfire example! Long term consequences are hard, indeed, and getting people to be more cognizant of that is the million dollar question. Education is the only thing I can think of but life experience seems to far outweigh that. This is going a bit off topic but I recently listened to a [This American Life]( recording about those babies they give to high schoolers in an attempt to dissuade them from becoming pregnant - and it turns out it did nothing to reduce teen pregnancies. My 3 year old is a runner. Both in the parking lot and at home he has taken off into oncoming traffic. What has so far worked for me is a total loss of trust and loss of freedom. When I go to the store I park next to the shopping cart return and grab a cart from there and put him in the cart directly from the car. He hated being forced into the cart but accepts it now. If we are going somewhere without a cart, I take out his baby brother first, and only when everything else is ready do I lastly take my toddler out. I hold his hand constantly, dragging him if he doesn't like it (he's accepting it now and the dragging is lessening). When I pull into my garage I shut the garage door first before I let him out of his carseat. When I go to the park I force him to be strapped into his double stroller before we head out to there and then again when we leave. I know a lot of people use leashes as well. I also have child proofing on the outside doors of my home because he started pushing the chair to the doors to unlock them and then leave. What works for one kid may not work the next though. My brother's toddler is aggressive towards others and they have now started to spank. I definitely don't have all the answers so I don't plan to confront them on that. And heck I sure do have the urge to spank my kid sometimes. When kids are this little I don't know how much they actually think first before acting though. One of the times my son bolted into the street was because he saw a bird on the other side he wanted to chase. I'm not sure what the reason was the other times(my son is speech delayed). Best of luck to us all! I think the people who take the time to come to parenting forums can be considered the 'good' parents who really do care. There's no easy answers to this parenting gig that's for sure!

  • Grace Franecki Reply

    Continued from here, following this [ExRP thread.]( _______ Past the few minutes since Aisha had informed him that she was heading back, Ralis walked out to a less crowded spot, looking to the skies for a dragon and a robot in its talons. Sure enough, Vargas had flown past, towards his own Summoner. And following him back was the large armoured dragon, grasping a dark-coloured bulky suit of armour in its claws. Glancing around to estimate the possible landing spot, Ralis proceeded to back away quickly to give the dragon room to land. Already from afar, the dragoon clad in red had silently guided her dragon to make a steady descent, spreading its wings to catch the draft, slowing its flight toward the frosted ground. ["Get ready to land, Seven, we can't make a perfect stop like this, but we'll try our best,"](/tg) the dragoon, Aisha, called out to the payload in black below her. The dragon flapped its wings as it neared the ground, stirring up the frost as it lightly set down the dark armoured figure on its feet. Following that, the reptilian beast released its hold and flew upwards again, to avoid accidentally knocking over the newcomer. Clearing some distance between itself and Seven, it glided close to the ground once more as its rider performed a leaping dismount. Avoiding eye contact with the onlooking Summoner in green, Aisha glanced around at the other Summoners, Units, Killer Princess, and Seven, watching their moves. While she wanted to help with diplomacy on the side of the mechanical being, she was unsure as to how the others would react. [*"... It looks rather... ominous... Aisha, are you sure it's a good idea...?"*](#6c9) she heard her Summoner's soft voice. [*"Only one way to find out,"*](/tg) she replied, glancing at Vargas, before deciding to speak up. ["I have returned from scouting. This is Seven, a... combat drone that Vargas and I found in the ruins of what appeared to be a factory in that direction,"](/tg) Aisha pointed towards where she had flown in from, ["Have no fear, he has requested to accompany me."](/tg) [*"How will you explain the moments you disappear to let another one of us take your place, mama bird? Hm?"*](#336) Eve's mildly mocking tone interrupted the formal mood that Aisha was attempting to put across. [*"I hope that doesn't mean that you're getting him as your new pet, because between a dragon and a huge touchy squid, I don't think I can handle another weird pet for you,"*](#6c9) Ralis snarked, watching his summon and the automation carefully. He did not voice it out at all other than in his thoughts, but there was a nagging impression that there was a potential magical presence within Seven. As he let the view of the frosted land transition into spectres of faded colours scattered on emptiness, he saw minute presences where the combat unit stood. [*"... Aisha, I trust that you already know this. But be on your guard,"*](#6c9) he thought, considering on finding a way to warn the others. _________ Heeeeeeeere's Seven! /u/Tetranort - get in here boi All other active personnel, meet your new friend! /u/miririri, /u/ShuffledTurtle

  • Bridgette Bode Reply

    Even with reading the book you have no idea how truly bad the mental abuse was. It was carried out with the purpose of breaking an individual down to the point of fractured personality. Secretive Rites and Rituals designed to illuminate the mystery of our history. Mr. Robot is more based in reality than you think for a TV show. Its based off a true person and a real place. Washington Township was the Klahanie Plateau in the Seattle Region. Red Wheelbarrow is a real thing that exists in Spokane. I know you probably don't believe me that its all a conspiracy. We've been trained subconsciously and conditioned to write anyone who utters the word off as a loon. I wouldn't expect you to trust me either friend. But I speak the truth, albeit I am a bit paranoid for well justified and documented reasons. I hold the secrets and am a key to the whole story. Its been a Truman show so to speak. A person's whole life owned by a corporate empire of musicians, artists, and hippies built upon the empire of greedy bankers and prepared to crush it beneath it. You think they all died and became junkies after Woodstock? No, those college kids highly educated simply started playing the same game of illusion and culture weaving so they could change the future. Internet unlocked mysteries of universal cultures for any curious eye. No longer reliant on the gatekeepers of media, govt sponsored libraries and its historical archive records. "He who controls the present, controls the past. He who controls the past, controls the future." Add the word culture/dream/society after the words present/past/future and you see that its been written by those in control since Jesus wrote the finale. Rev 10 sign in the heavens comes next year. Have you been looking up lately or only straight ahead like Tyrell? Do you know how we invented time to pull humanity out of chaos? Would you be able to track time across millennia if you were left stranded on an Island for years? You know those rings on Darlene's hand at the end of the App game? My sister has had the same ones for years. Even knows some Broadway Producers and Hollywood Writers. The smiley face on the Careful Massacre? Same as whats been covering my mothers webcam. Her email? Hint: Ends with 777. Her Bookshelves? Loaded with every type of biblical book you could imagine. Strict Private School and social isolation as a kid too to further parental dependacy and sadistic abuse. Words have immeasurable power. An upbringing designed to teach kids like E to love to fear and fear to love before they get a chance to be any the wiser. Monkey See Monkey Do. If you believe we are derived from monkeys then you best wrap that neadreathal brain around that concept. Carla was from High School. Leon too. Even Alex. Carla was in my drivers ed class. Leon used to get rides from me to school and now I share my lucid dreams with him to spread among his artistic circles while locked away in this trap. He's token black of South park too. It's why Cartman has a Token Lives Matter in this season too. Because I am a part of that show's inspiration too. Do you trust the Free Masons to tear down the Illuminati puppet show of government control? Its an invisible war. One over the collective dream of society. God. Its as real as we make of it and so God is a very real thing. The breadcrumbs are left for me to see as my perception holds the key to understanding their significance. Not even an advanced computer could crack the code. Its buried deep in the source code of my life. Even the games I've played in youth are being dug up. It started with Maniac Mansion, Day of the Tentacle. Old DOS games my father gave me. Proceeding to Deus Ex (2000). You know the one without the WTC in the background despite occuring before 9/11. The one with the scientific understanding of what now is possible but was only theory back then. Micro and Nano Tech. Universal DNA constructors, used to make viruses for population control. Its all staged in real life. But to fully understand that truth is a rather frightening and heavy burden as it can make you realize just how powerless and insignificant you are. Weaker minds tend to break and push people towards death and suicide the closer to that edge they get. We're all like Ants under a Microscope of an All Seeing Eye that follows you everywhere you go. Its the same one printed on the back of those dollar bills rolled up in your pocket. Follow your money. Do you know how they anticipate societal collapse? Its measured in sin and calculated in dollars/currency. See the churches all feed information up pipelines to a denominational centralized power location. Rome for the ancient christian empire. Jerusalem for the Jewish/Islamic one. NYC for the current New World Order one with the UN and Wall St. running world trade. Governments can utilize the data from adult church to measure average Joe while also using the church to brainwash/instruct the impressionable youth who have a clean slate/pure innocence on life. Its a system akin to offerings in biblical times before money changers arrived at the temple. Livestock and Land was peoples livelihood back then. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and think as if you were living with only the resources available at the time. By giving one animal up selflessly it acted like a sort of census of the region to determine when drought was coming and allowed the wise men who advised the kings to prepare for the worst and protect its denizens. Priests like ancient weathermen/meteorologists predicting and anticipating to weather natures storms and wrath by paying a close eye. What gets measured gets manages is a proverbial saying of wisdom. The Chinese zodiac measures time like how White Rose controls his/hers with a tight grip down to the seconds. Want to be a succesful fisher? know when the spawning seasons occur. Want to be a fisher of men? know when the seasons were occurring by studying the stars. Obvious common sense to us today but not so much to the primitive cultures of the past. They've already written the script for my life. Designed to bring about an end game and the start of a new one. Its all connected. The caged bird of J Cole. The Khloros colored album of Kendrick Lamar. Everything. Its a small world after all and the creatives write the narrative that the public is addicted to. After all, who doesn't like a bit of fiction to lighten the dull mundane 9-5 routine most get stuck in to support a family. Here's a thought experiment for those of you who have made it this far and are still curious as to just what the Hell it is I am raving about. I call it the Rat Race. See, we are all like mice stuck in the system. Chasing cheese and searching for an escape at our earliest convenience. So Here Goes. Be prepared to get out of your mind for a moment and think in abstract metaphorical ways here. Third Eye Vision. You don't have to be high for this. For some it may help. To each his own. We all have our vices in life. Step 1: Draw a basic Maze. Imagine yourself as that 2d dot at the tip of the pen. And your hand being the guiding hand over your life. Role models and idols that lead you down your chosen path. The trail of the pen is representative of your life over time. Step 2: Try and solve it without turning into a dead end ever. Hard to do right? Stop. Don't read ahead until you have tried it IRL. it only takes a minute to set up this little game. Done with 1 and 2? Now try this then. Step 3 [Spoiler] ("Solve the maze but this time going from the End to Start. Then act like the line is invisible and start from the beginning again searching for the Finish, pretending that the solution isn't laid out already. That's cheating though! you might be inclined to say. Well show me what rule was laid out that prohibited it. See the problem is most people only follow the rules like the mouse rather than challenge tradition and imagine new ones.") Reflective Post Analysis [Spoiler] ("Like a Guide Dog leading the Blind Mouse using pavlovian tricks and social conditioning to push the mouse further along when it starts to get distracted, tires of the game, or attempts to follow its free will instead of your will as God of the mouse and symbolic invisible hand of the Illuminati pushing it towards its inevitable fate. You'll find its much easier to avoid the dead ends and traps if you work backwards from a predetermined end point. Do you start to see what I mean about the Final Solution? Likely not, it took a lifetime of 25 years to even get to this point in the labyrinth. What I've shared in this post is but a glimpse through a keyhole in a universe sized door") Think outside the box that institutional schools have put you in. We were all graded like slave Chattel and our lives securitized by debt to assign a value to your works worth. We even are given a unique number at birth that no one stops to think much about. Used in Credit ratings, Job Applications, even used to determine an actuarial calculated subsequent life insurance death payout to a loved one after retirement planning. The Grim Truth. The system is designed to strip imagination and force people to think like a machine business man. Numbers and Word Inputs without so much as a second thought as to the construct of your personal bubble and its mental box's true form. I'm that impossible kid, Aesop Rock speaks of too. A guy with a million faces and a million names. A mask to wear for every party and occasion seamlessly blending into the mundane grind of a mad city. Such is the life of the child born by masonic design on a designated date to symbolically serve a purpose. In my case I've been socially conditioned and programmed to usher in the new era using my life story as a sacrifice to prevent a real Orwellian/Huxley future from occurring. Exciting Times We Are Living In. Hello Friend. Ask me any questions you want but the answers will only lead to more questions.

  • Helene Bednar Reply

    So, i'm pretty sure we can all agree that Laura has become the best girl. But let's take some things out of the way before we talk about the fabulous Laura. Like, [FINALLY!]( If they are manufacturing MS parts, then, they probably may also be planning on manufacturing their *own* MS. That would be wonderful! Well, kinda, there's a huge gap between manufacturing parts and actually doing the whole thing. Creating new parts and spare parts for the Militia Mobile Suits shouldn't be hard, i mean, considering their technological situation i'm pretty sure they have some fairly good machinery for the job, like metal lathes and even drilling machines. That's all you need to create new parts for a giant robot if you ask me. Is it just me or Miashei is rather....[open]( today? I never noticed how *mature* she was, isn't she like 14-15? Heh, at least she isn't a tsundere like Sochie (well, i hope; i really expect that Sochie's annoying behavior is just a tsundere stance). Talking about Sochie, apparently her uniform now use [pants instead of a dress]( , not as classy as before, but sure a lot more conventional (is it weird that's the third consecutive thread i talk about her uniform?) Now, on the preparations for Laura's creation! Let me tell you this, i already thought Loran was a [beautiful girl]( even before they finished training him. Perhaps the only other MC equal in terms of feminine beauty on previous shows was Bellri (i know you too liked when he messed with his hair). But, this only applies to facial aesthetics, in terms of body shape it is....well, Loran is a blue-collar guy, he spent nearly two years on mines doing heavy labour work; i find it really hard to believe it wasn't such a issue when Kihel was turning him into Laura. Specially the thinner waist part, how can you make a pure muscle and bone waist thinner ? [Unconventional methods for sure]( But, let's be honest here, it [**really** pays off](, i don't know if i like her (from now on, everytime Loran dresses himself as Laura i will call him she) clothes of hair the most! It's a brillant design! And it's even more brillant compared to the Moonrace rather [weird fashion]( Laura Rola is without a doubt a beautiful lady (Fun fact: Rola is a popular slang for dick here in my country, so, it's Laura Dick) I find it funny that the Militia commander guy [bought a soldier on his car](, also, he's a rather buff guy, uh? But not as funny as [Harry's fashion](; is dressing like a upside down bee the current fashion on the Moon? Those are the true barbarians! Someone should call Glemmy's fashion police there. Oh,look, [engrish](! Is Peath supposed to be Peace? Love and Peace, uh; i wonder how old this phrase is. Now, back to the fashion talk, what the hell is [Dianna wearing]( So, while Henry dress himself like a upside down bee, she dresses herself like a....bird? What's with the rich fashion on the moon? Miran seems like the only normal dude there. [Now, this is quite the scene](, and i just realized that the girl on the opening, besides Henry is [actually this Laura]( Does this mean he will develop a crush on "her"? Will we get more Laura on future episodes? Man, i hope so! This is such a funny thing, a nice variation of the usual "love between enemies" trope that all Gundams have. The antagonist of the show in love with the woman-version of the male protagonist! One thing i don't understand is, why they requested the stand from the Militia? I guess the next time i ask for a cake i will insist with the baker that he get the stand of the cake from the Army. Truth be told, [it's a nice cake tho]( It's sure very different from the [original concept]( given to them, but it's a nice interpretation from it. I feel like the original think was like a representation of the Moonrace's view of the Moon being above Earth, meaning they are the ones in control. This final version tho, is a lot more harmonic and peaceful, with the feel of both Earth and the Moon being one (both are in half, so, they complete each other) And of course, a band of assassins comes a try to kill the Queen. Laura being such a wonderful lady, get in the Gundam and chase them, but is unable to kill them. They drop a breathing device, leading Henry and the other to wonder if those people were actually from the Moonrace. I think that would be cool, having the Moonrace being actually as troublesome as Inglessa, having independent individuals trying to kill their own Queen for some reason. >DQOTD 10/10, i'd say it's the most unique girl in this rewatch so far. Loran is a cool guy and also, probably the only one MC yet who's not a hothead.

  • Mabelle Pfeffer Reply

    Again, you fail to understand how the U.S. works. You can sufficiently democratize government and make it transparent enough to minimize the impacts of corruption. The fact you think this is impossible shows how far removed you are from being able to partake in any sort of struggle of this sort. >Very different. Market controls are about private industry battling it out. Except "market controls" and "private industry" are still susceptible to human corruption. The same quote you used to describe angels and government can just as easily be applied to free markets. >If government doesn't regulate, then they have nothing to control and shift their focus back to beating their competitors. So you're admitting a need for government regulation??? >You cannot cure greed, child. Most of humanity doesn't suffer from excessive greed. Those who do often rise to the top because they are driven by their ambition to dominate others. We can place public servants before greedy executives. It's not rocket science. >And you cannot tax the big guys without taxing the little ones. You most certainly can. There are many governments right now doing it in Europe. There will still be taxes on the "little guys" but it will be proportionate and fair. >Hundreds of times it's tried and when the doors close and the committees meet with "industry leaders" the power shifts to the cronies. This issue is unrelated to taxation policy. >What rich person wouldn't spend every last dime fighting such legislation? Well, all the millionaires/billionaires that came out in support of Sanders for one, such as Ben and Jerry's. Not all billionaires are bad people. Many would be willing to give more of their profits up for a just cause. >Fair would be the other way, no one pays ANY taxes. Lol. Have fun with no roads or public schools, or running water. >And you cannot legislate humanity, child. Yeah... and the past 10,000+ years of human civilization in which laws have been formed and enforced proves you wrong. >Someone has to maintain and operate the robots. And? We can design machines that design machines, or design machines to maintain machines. Even so, you're looking at one *niche* job - a robot engineer. I doubt billions of people will transition into designing and maintaining robots. >People still want handmade food and goods. This will become a hobby/pasttime. Most people will opt not to work provided they don't have to. Those who do will reap certain benefits. Also, liberating ourselves from labor will allow more people to do things they enjoy that may or may not have been adequate jobs in the past. Cooking is one of those things. >And by your logic, if there are no jobs, how can you expect other people to pay for the jobless? Am I to work to support 10 other people in addition to my family? That bird don't fly, boychick. You won't be working because your job will be automated, "boychick." If by "other people" you mean the people who also won't be working - the executives who will "own" these robots, then yeah, we would expect them to redistribute wealth from their fully automated company down to everyone else because that's the only way we'll sustain a technological society. >economics is everything. Horseshit. Science is everything. Economics is a psuedo-science. Hardly verifiable, which is why there is so much disagreement among "experts." You cannot argue w/ physics. You cannot argue w/ technological trends. Humanity is progressing towards a technological age in which we will not need most forms of labor.

  • Megane Eichmann Reply

    Its pretty well established that Elsie has little respect for the other departments or going through the proper channels, she sees a problem and she feels the need to fix it herself. The revealing of her greater ambitions and the fact she doesn't know who to trust in this situation covers that pretty well in my opinion. The spooky office scene was really out of place and didn't make a lot of sense. Hopefully there's an explanation coming but a reason should have been established before that scene so it didn't feel so out of place/nonsensical. The Maeve scene was just a complete mess. Her reactions and reasoning were spot on but Felix and Sylvester were just terrible. I've seen the excuses and frankly they just don't cut it. First of all: any worry about getting fired goes out the window when the malfunctioning robot is threatening to gut people. No job, no side income, no ambition is worth being gutted alive. Felix might have been fascinated by Maeve and worried about being caught with the bird but his best option for keeping his job and moving up was turning her in, not breaking protocol further. There's even a chance catching such a major problem, missed by everyone else, would get him the promotion he desperately wants. Sylvester has no reason to play along. Not only was he the one she threatened to kill but it's been established that the higher ups already know about the techs fucking the hosts, if he's been running an entire prostitution ring I don't see how he wouldn't have realized that by now. Even when Elsie was blackmailing that other butcher to get access to the woodcutter the threat wasn't that he'd be fired, it was that he would be humiliated if his coworkers knew. If getting fire was, believed by the butchers, to be a realistic threat she would have used it to get what she wanted but she didn't. It also just doesn't really make sense: the hosts are there for the guests as prostitutes, the idea that management would be so outraged by the techs using them that they'd fire them is really a stretch.

  • Erich Simonis Reply

    I wouldn't call Felix and Sylvester dumb employees. Although you can make a strong case for both of them. Felix with his robot bird shenanigans and Sylvester with his robot sex habits. But I wouldn't call them dumb just careless. Maeve is pretty charming and convincing normally. She's a prostitute. It's basically her job. Combine that with Felix being impartial towards robots and probably a little be scared of Maeve when she woke up the other time and scared him, it's easy to see how she was able to manipulate Felix. With Sylvester she just straight up blackmailed him. Maeve even said "If you're being fucked, might as well go with the lucrative option" The Lucrative option being seeing how this all plays out and hoping it doesn't get pinned on them and instead gets pinned on the other guy messing with her stats. Elsie runs off alone to investigate possible sabotage that only her and Bernard knows about. It makes perfect sense that she doesn't bring a security team which would basically announce to the saboteur they are in trouble. Everything else though I agree with.

  • Elna Breitenberg Reply

    Sorry it's taken me so long to answer. I've been percolating on it and i've also been sick as hell. But I wanted to give a thoughtful answer. But i'm feverish so pardon the run-on sentences and crazy ramblings. It's no coincidence that the use of birds have been withheld (for the most part) since ep 1. I think it's a clue to the physical location of the park. Whether it's a Matrix style computer programmed VR (lots of evidence against this, though) or a terraformed/domed area on another planet. But the park is not just a big chunk of reserved land somewhere out in N America or anywhere on Earth. Unless Earth is decoid of native life or it's way the hell underground somewhere. Up until episode 4, where Teddy is hanging from the tree next to a buzzard, we haven't *seen* any evidence of birds. Twice, we hear a mourning dove's call that triggers Dolores to wake up and start her loop, but that seems like an audio trigger built in to wake her up. This is strange for a Western themed show. Eagles, buzzards, hawks, and crows are hugely symbolic of the genre, so the fact that they're used so little seems to be a purposeful thing. The bird we see in ep 5 is a big piece of foreshadowing. The bird is revived with some programming and it seems to have cleared its Good Samaritan (TM) reflex that prevents it from hurting humans because it bites the jerk technician. At clearly states all animals are of the park's design and programmed to not hurt you. It's completely plausible that the Good Samaritan reflex can be disabled with a hard reset like that (think "reset back to factory settings" type of a deal.) You could argue that it wouldn't have killed him anyway and you *can* get hurt in the park, but then what meaning would this scene have? I think it's meant to show how dangerous the hosts may actually be in the right circumstances. I'm beginning to think that the MIB will find the center of the maze, force restart all of the hosts and the guests will be in real danger. Logan's cavalier attitude of "it's all just a game!" will get him killed. William is going to have a bad time realizing he's in love with a robot - who's evolving to not be a robot - but still, that'll make an awkward break up speech when he goes home to his fiancé. And the park's owners will have a real bad time trying to clean up the upcoming PR disaster. Oh, and this theory is not dependent on the "single" timeline theory. If there are dual timelines, same thing could happen to both sets of characters on different time lines. History has a tendency of repeating itself!

  • Reggie Weissnat Reply

    Don't mess around with the stuff. Look up chemical burns, sodium hydroxide, etc. If handling parts or anything that could have caustic on it, of course I'm going to be wearing nitrile gloves. Especially hot caustic (which is almost always is). I don't panic about anything under 3-4%, but I sure as hell rinse immediately with water or diluted peracetic from my parts bucket. We follow strict PPE guidelines when handling anything undiluted. Face mask, elbow length rubber gloves over normal gloves, and apron. After grabbing gallons of the stuff during a shift, I've gotten splattered and was glad I had it on. I wish I had some profound sage advice, but in all honesty, after seeing several nasty accidents involving urgent care or ER visits that could have *easily* been avoided or just as easily ended up worse, I'd say safety is pretty fucking important

  • Corene Koch Reply

    \#|Score|Deleted? (/r/undelete)|Post :--|:--|:--|:--|:-- 1|+2920| |[Coin it. Jeanine Pirro says Clintons are a "Cesspool of corruptables".]( (The_Donald) [\[**148 comments**\]](/r/The_Donald/comments/59yk8a/coin_it_jeanine_pirro_says_clintons_are_a/) 2|+5488|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59vbix/25488169_how_tf_california_in_a_drought/)** (1)|[How tf California in a drought]( (BlackPeopleTwitter) [\[**169 comments**\]](/r/BlackPeopleTwitter/comments/59ugc0/how_tf_california_in_a_drought/) 3|+5743|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59yfdd/35743136_money_well_spent_rfunny/)** (1)|[Money well spent]( (funny) [\[**136 comments**\]](/r/funny/comments/59wuz7/money_well_spent/) 4|+5587|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59xkan/35587193_every_fucking_week_rfunny/)** (1)|[Every Fucking Week]( (funny) [\[**193 comments**\]](/r/funny/comments/59vozf/every_fucking_week/) 5|+5055|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59yh6f/55055173_how_to_stay_relaxed_in_bad_traffic/)** (1)|[How to stay relaxed in bad traffic]( (lifehacks) [\[**173 comments**\]](/r/lifehacks/comments/59wlps/how_to_stay_relaxed_in_bad_traffic/) 6|+6362|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59vy0e/36362156_time_goes_on_but_proportions_stays_the/)** (1)|[Time goes on, but proportions stays the same]( (aww) [\[**156 comments**\]](/r/aww/comments/59udkw/time_goes_on_but_proportions_stays_the_same/) 7|+4683|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59wiwz/7468389_when_he_playing_head_games/)** (1)|[When he playing head games]( (BlackPeopleTwitter) [\[**89 comments**\]](/r/BlackPeopleTwitter/comments/59utgq/when_he_playing_head_games/) 8|+4349|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59vzzk/74349545_necrophilia_happened_often_enough_fhat/)** (3)|[Necrophilia happened often enough fhat they had to invent a word for it]( (Showerthoughts) [\[**545 comments**\]](/r/Showerthoughts/comments/59udc0/necrophilia_happened_often_enough_fhat_they_had/) 9|+5577|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59x2yz/95577761_how_is_it_that_facebook_can_recognize/)** (2)|[How is it that facebook can recognize faces, cars can almost drive themselves, but the vending machine still can't read my dollar bill if it has a wrinkle?]( (Showerthoughts) [\[**761 comments**\]](/r/Showerthoughts/comments/59upmm/how_is_it_that_facebook_can_recognize_faces_cars/) 10|+7046|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59vvxr/770461828_finally_got_some_communication_about_no/)** (1)|[Finally got some communication about No Man's Sky from Hello Games]( (gaming) [\[**1828 comments**\]](/r/gaming/comments/59u8o7/finally_got_some_communication_about_no_mans_sky/) 11|+5233| |[I think my girlfriend's Weird Al costume is spot on!]( (pics) [\[**266 comments**\]](/r/pics/comments/59xhnu/i_think_my_girlfriends_weird_al_costume_is_spot_on/) 12|+6184| |[If this post reaches 2000 upskys. this subreddit will become a Mr Robot sub in support of Hello Games' binge]( (NoMansSkyTheGame) [\[**378 comments**\]](/r/NoMansSkyTheGame/comments/59xdrl/if_this_post_reaches_2000_upskys_this_subreddit/) 13|+4087| |[This bird we sell resembles Donald Trump.]( (mildlyinteresting) [\[**165 comments**\]](/r/mildlyinteresting/comments/59xv86/this_bird_we_sell_resembles_donald_trump/) 14|+3421| |[Scientists identify region in the brain responsible for the "placebo effect" in pain relief, when a fake treatment actually results in substantial reduction of pain. The findings could result in the design of more personalized medicine for millions of people currently living with chronic pain.]( (science) [\[**146 comments**\]](/r/science/comments/59xr0i/scientists_identify_region_in_the_brain/) 15|+2812| |[My sobriety.]( (pics) [\[**210 comments**\]](/r/pics/comments/59yad5/my_sobriety/) 16|+4410| |[LPT: Complete a simple task like making up your bed or preparing an actual breakfast when you wake up in the morning. The feeling of even the smallest accomplishment has been proven to make you more productive during the day.]( (LifeProTips) [\[**383 comments**\]](/r/LifeProTips/comments/59x8lp/lpt_complete_a_simple_task_like_making_up_your/) 17|+6099|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59vgcw/176099409_cat_what_do_raww/)** (1)|[cat?? what do??]( (aww) [\[**409 comments**\]](/r/aww/comments/59tdj7/cat_what_do/) 18|+2570| |[Emerson Polls Show Razor Thin Race Between Trump, Clinton in PA, Statistical Tie in NH]( (The_Donald) [\[**245 comments**\]](/r/The_Donald/comments/59yf08/emerson_polls_show_razor_thin_race_between_trump/) 19|+6175| |[My new baby!]( (aww) [\[**445 comments**\]](/r/aww/comments/59wief/my_new_baby/) 20|+4696| |[TIL for over 15 years Paul Rudd has been showing the same clip of Mac and Me on the Conan O'Brien instead of clips from the movies he's starring in and promoting.]( (todayilearned) [\[**752 comments**\]](/r/todayilearned/comments/59wxgq/til_for_over_15_years_paul_rudd_has_been_showing/) 21|+3053|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59w9ll/213053500_a_new_male_contraceptive_injection_is/)** (2)|[A new male contraceptive injection is 96% effective in human tests]( (science) [\[**500 comments**\]](/r/science/comments/59up7p/a_new_male_contraceptive_injection_is_96/) 22|+2252| |[DONALD J. TRUMP AUGUST 29TH STATEMENT: "I only worry for the country in that Hillary Clinton was careless and negligent in allowing Weiner to have such close proximity to highly classified information."]( (The_Donald) [\[**124 comments**\]](/r/The_Donald/comments/59ymj8/donald_j_trump_august_29th_statement_i_only_worry/) 23|+3378| |[Too soon?]( (funny) [\[**90 comments**\]](/r/funny/comments/59x73q/too_soon/) 24|+4505| |[Know Your Types!]( (pokemon) [\[**509 comments**\]](/r/pokemon/comments/59wn27/know_your_types/) 25|+5424| |[9ft tall beaver damn breaks emptying large lake. Before, during, and after.]( (videos) [\[**818 comments**\]](/r/videos/comments/59w9vv/9ft_tall_beaver_damn_breaks_emptying_large_lake/) 26|+5339| |[The cat stalks its prey]( (gifs) [\[**418 comments**\]](/r/gifs/comments/59w844/the_cat_stalks_its_prey/) 27|+3318|**[YES](/r/undelete/comments/59x2rn/273318214_electric_elevator_desks_in_prague_1937/)** (1)|[Electric elevator desks in Prague, 1937]( (OldSchoolCool) [\[**214 comments**\]](/r/OldSchoolCool/comments/59uwdb/electric_elevator_desks_in_prague_1937/) 28|+3099| |[TIL the leader of the US nuclear regulatory agency is Mr. Burns]( (todayilearned) [\[**81 comments**\]](/r/todayilearned/comments/59xj4s/til_the_leader_of_the_us_nuclear_regulatory/) 29|+4460| |[Happy Friday ;)]( (BustyPetite) [\[**144 comments**\]](/r/BustyPetite/comments/59whr6/happy_friday/)

  • Gregoria Mertz Reply

    Hey there Mob, please find my critique below. This is my 1st critique since finding DR, so take that into account if necessary. Also, whichever Anon used pink to put edits on your 1st page may have put too much. It was hard to read with a good flow with all the pink strikeouts, edits, additions, etc. I had to search to find your original wording to give critique. **Overall** I finished reading your piece and I have to say that it was very difficult to follow. Hopefully you aren't heavily offended by this, but from the way some of your sentences were constructed, it seems like English is not your native language. I took that into consideration while I was reading in order to give you the benefit of the doubt. Word pairings like "School Compounds" instead of "school grounds," or "choice of weapon" instead of "weapon of choice" seemed to me like pairings that an ESL individual would translate into English. Aside from that, some (or a lot) of your grammar was incorrect and the pink-anon had turned your 1st page into a warzone because of that. From reading this, I gathered that the plot concerns 3 friends in detention for a mundane offense (smoking) and Mr. Naem is trying to teach them some deeper philosophical lesson via tic-tac-toe, or maybe he was just fucking with them because he hates kids. I honestly couldn't tell what the end purpose of this piece was by reading it. The final piece of dialogue tells the student that he needs to learn to shutup, but the teacher was trying to originally get them to realize they could get out of detention easily by scheming with one another? So I was confused about that whole exchange. Overall, I understood that this piece is the retelling of an event in Marks life, but if there was meant to be some underlying lesson or a philosophical question asked, then it was lost on me. It read more like a stream of consciousness diary page from the student, than it did something that was meant to be a vehicle for a message. > Me, Andy, and Dwight served detention on an otherwise, pleasant afternoon The very first sentence felt very strange to read and took me away from my reading flow immediately. I re-read this first sentence 2 or 3 times to feel it out in my head and read it aloud once to see how it sounded, and it felt choppy, like something we would write when first learning (which is ok, you'll get better at it). First off, writing "me, Andy, and Dwight..." would sound better, to me, being written as "Andy, Dwight, and myself..." or even using "My friends and I..." and then you can tell us their names by showing us later on. Such as having the narrator or the teacher use their name in dialogue. Also, just as an edit, you don't need the comma after "otherwise." It chopped the sentence up even further and I felt like I was stepping across obstacles just to get to the end of the sentence. > It was stupid on our part to be experimenting on school compounds If you had not mentioned that everyone had been caught smoking in the previous sentence, I would have assumed that this sentence was talking about the boys being caught having sex with one another in the bathroom. If you're going to use the word experimenting, you may want to remove it here and place it in your previous sentence so that you could say that everyone was caught experimenting with smoking. But even then, it sounds pretentious to an extent. I never really hear of many people experimenting with smoking. People experiment with hard drugs, bisexuality, or on research materials. But everyone I know that smokes doesn't say that they experimented with it originally. You could perhaps reword it to say "It was stupid on our part to be breaking the law on school grounds" or, "We should have known we would be caught smoking in such a confined space like the bathroom." Also, "School Compounds" isn't really anything I've ever seen placed together in a sentence. If you want a more natural sounding pairing, I'd go with "school grounds," "campus," or "school property." > We took up a classroom big enough... Your 2nd paragraph felt like it came out of right-field. We went from talking about how the smoke behaved in the cramped bathroom, to describing how much volume they displaced in a random room without any sort of transition. I would recommend some manner of transition sentence, or even ending the previous paragraph with their journey to detention. Something along the lines of "When the school day ended finally, we left to go serve our time in detention..." then you can go into describing the room they're in so that I know that the room they're in is the detention room, because you don't mention where you are anywhere else. > It was quiet, with only three of us sitting at the front desks From this sentence, to the end of the paragraph, I was mostly lost. You didn't have to tell us that it's more quiet when 3 people are alone in a room compared to more than 20. And you didn't really need to explain what sort of sounds would be heard in a busy classroom. Most of us went to school, and if you had simply said that it was more quiet with you 3 in there than usual, I could have filled in the blanks with memories of the noises of a crowded classroom. You don't have to hold your reader's hand and describe so much. > ...with owlish eyes, like a cobra with its head raised up and hood spread open... This whole sentence felt wrong. You explain his eyes as owlish (a bird) and then said he looked like a cobra (a reptile). so is he a bird/reptile hybrid? If you're going to use a simile, I'd stick to one comparison and run with that. Doing it this way, I saw the teacher as having large eyes that hardly ever blink and then a fat neck (from the open hood) and a forked tongue. It was more comical to me than daunting. I'd remove the owl reference, and stick solely with the cobra. You could say "...he stared at us across the room, unblinking, like a cobra poised to strike..." and then you can add whatever else you want to illicit. You don't have to say that the hood is spread open either. We can all picture a cobra, and most everyone's mental image of a cobra has the hood open, otherwise it looks like a normal snake. > I reckoned Dwight and Andy had the same face I had whenever I tried solving an algebra problem. [Etc] First off, the narrator shouldn't "reckon" in my mind. He either knows, or he doesn't know. I'm assuming he can see his friend's faces, so he shouldn't have to guess what type of face they're making. This whole paragraph is the narrator trying to explain that his friends looked like he does when he tried to solve algebra problems. Then the entire rest of the paragraph is the narrator explaining how each friend described the face that the narrator makes when doing math. This was boring to read. You told the reader, instead of showed them. You could cut this entire paragraph out and the story would not have been worse for it. Which, to me, means that this paragraph doesn't really serve a purpose. It's filler. If you intend for this paragraph to be meaningful, you need to show your reader the faces that Mark's friends are making, not tell the reader that the friends make a face like "I" (the narrator) makes. Then explain that face. That's not the right way to go about it, imo. You could rewrite this paragraph to instead *show* the faces that the friends are making and take out the explanation of how the narrator looks at algebra problems completely. "Dwight's face drained of emotion and he pressed his lips into a thin line." gives me the same mental image of how Dwight looks without you having to tell the reader by explaining that 1) Dwight made a face, 2.) That face looks like the same face that Narrator makes when he does algebra, 3.) Narrator's face looks like *xyz* when he does algebra, 4.) therefor, Dwights face looks like step#3. You basically had me do my own math problem to try and figure out what Dwight's face looked like. That would be brilliant if it was intentional and meant to make the reader feel the same way about math that the narrator does, but I doubt that's the case. > Challenge each other all the way to > Mark, shut up. The half hour starts now This exchange is another case of you telling more than showing. The teacher explains exactly what is going on in his detention hall. He basically rattles off a list of what the rest of the page is going to contain. And that feels a bit forced. It's like you giving me a grocery list of what the rest of the story is going to entail. I understand that a teacher would give out instructions on the lesson plan. But the dialogue itself does not sound like how a normal human speaks. If I had to guess, this probably sounded like normal communication to you in your head when you were writing it, but if you said this whole exchange aloud, it sounds like a robot clipping through their parameters. "you do x. you do y. if not y, then you will do z. do this until I say so. Again, remember, do x." It made the teacher out to be not a real character in my eyes and he's more of just a placeholder in your story for information being dumped on the reader. The teacher does not feel like a real person at this point. Secondly, this is the 1st time that you mention the name "Mark." When I got here, I stopped reading at first. I thought I had forgotten a line or a paragraph and had no idea where I was. Who is Mark? It wasn't until I went back that I could pull context to make the connection that it was the Narrator's name. No one else ever called him by name before this point, so I thought there was a 4th person in detention that I hadn't noticed. You could remedy this by having a dialogue between Andy/Dwight and the Narrator where the friend calls the Narrator by name. That way, I know the name of the narrator, and you don't have to force-feed it to me by writing something like "Hi, I'm Mark, and this is my story about detention." or "Me (mark), Andy, and Dwight..." at the beginning.

  • Crystal Fadel Reply

    Even if you wore long, elbow length gloves over latex gloves with a full rubber apron and galoshes? I did it that way for $10 an hour for a long time. I understand having an issue with certain things but I mean... forgot $14 billion an hour, I'd clean that shit with my tongue for $100 an hour. Might get fired for quality though.

  • Carrie Leffler Reply

    There's also the possibility of writing a "genesis" together, or having a God hierarchy, like the Greek Gods. By a "genesis", I mean how the Gods and the world came to be, instead of it just being "a bunch of Gods from other universes showed up from in an empty plane of existence". Then, the *actual* genesis, like the story of how the world got molded, that's what the first 10~20 turns are for. This would mean, however, that no Gods, or maybe not *all* Gods, would have a backstory, as they would be born with the world, or born long before the world, but in this same universe. ___ We also had the idea of having a single race of mortals this game, or a single "base" race (the one that is dominant, and outnumbers all others by far). This is because the world often becomes crowded, and some races are always forgotten and left behind. Additionally, we often end up with wildly different races adopting similar, or identical social and cultural aspects. From a world-building perspective, this is poor design. Having a dominant race, and (possibly) other races that live in smaller groups and smaller territories, would rectify this, and make it easier not only to suspend disbelief, but also to *remember what the bloody races are*. Of course, we'd need to agree on something. These are options I had thought of: **Humans**: Reliable, relatable, but boring. Keytium likes them because he has poor taste. **Gnolls/Animal-morphs**: We can grab a human, and mold it together with an animal. human-hyenas are pretty popular, called gnolls, but we cand do it with any animal. This is more interesting than plain humans, but still a bit simple. Still, a world dominated by lion-people would be pretty interesting imo. Or skaven. Skaven everywhere. **Amphibian people**: Call 'em zoras, call 'em Gungans, or Remelus, the good thing about these kinda guys is that we can have on-land and under-water civilisations, and if they are the dominant race, no one will forget about the poor water people, like every other game. **Any High Fantasy typical race**: Possibly even more boring than humans, but for the sake of putting all the options down, we could go with orcs, dwarves ~~(<3)~~, elves, halflings, or any of all that. **Elementals**: Kinda like this game's Kisapan, having elementals as base mortals would have the advantage of allowing for lots and lots of variety amongst them, while keeping to a general theme. **Quadrupeds**: Be it sentient dogs, sentient rhinos, or a sentient quadruped entirely new animal, it would be pretty interesting to see how we shape the cultures and civilisations of a race that is devoid of hands. **Flyers/bird-people**: Since it seems we're going for a cheese-world, where everything is reversed, the worlds being spheres you live inside of, connected by tunnels, having a race that can fly could create many cool strories. It can be bird-people ~~(fuck Tammy)~~, angel-like, or some kind of forceful humans that have an innate ability to fly, a la Superman, or Dragon Ball. **Keytiums**: silicone based lifeforms, that are reminiscent in shape to crystalline-hippos with antelope features. They lack a musculature system. Their limb-plates are moved by a system of biologically charged electromagnets. They reproduce by making love to climate-maps. **Giants, and then small people, or vice-versa**: we could split the game in two parts, a shorter, early game where we play a race of normal people (the details of which would still need to be chosen), that then somehow goes extinct, leaving behind plenty of ruins, and then a new race is introduced, who is, however, far smaller, or far bigger, than the previous, making the ruins a marvel of architecture or a great little mystery. **Time Lords/Exalted/Basically mini-gods**: We could have our base race as some uber-powahful ultra people, which could be boring or cool depending on how we play it. Also, it would explain really easily why they are the dominant one. **Rocky/Earth people**: Kinda like the Inthak of the Illuminated lands, or the Gorons from Zelda, we could have a race of people that are born from the World itself, and are thus deeply connected to it/nature or something like that. It's not unheard of, but could be fun. **Gelatinous Blobs**: They could be cube-shaped, octahedron-shaped, Sean Connery-shaped, or even shape-shifters, but jello-people are always an option, and interesting under many aspects. **Avatar-people**: What about a race of people who are all identical on the outside, and relate with each other by projecting an avatar about who they want to be? Or maybe just normal, different people, who are still capable of projecting an avatar? It can have many original and exciting writing and world building options. **Shared memory peoples**: THe name says it all. People born with memory of all the others, and their ancestors. Perhaps there are many hive-memories instead of just one. I do agree this would get *really* hard to protray. **Insectoid People**: Antz is a bloody awesome movie. ___ Also, here are some other ideas for themes of the gods, on top of the animals idea I had proposed some time back. **Star-Gods**: Every God is a giant flying ball of light. They still have their power, and can be different in other ways, but they still have that shape. This has the disadvantge that any body-language when interacting with other would be greatly limited. Also, no hugs :( **Keytiums**: Silicone hippos are clearly above simple "mortals", and they deserve a place in the skies above. **Same-as-mortals Gods**: In many religions on Earth, most famously the Greek Pantheon, the Gods are just like, or very similar, to humans. Once a base race is chosen, if we choose one, we could have our Gods all resemble a member of that race, obviously with our own tweaks. Some of the proposed races above don't go well with this one, though. **Mechanical Gods**: What if all Gods were some kind of machine, or robot, created by a super-advanced civilisation of old? **Bird Gods**: Another take on the "animal Gods" choice, where every God is, more specifically, a bird. We already had an Eagle God and a Death Bird Goddess this game, we can go deeper! **All-In-One Gods**: What if, all our the Gods you guys will play are actually the various aspects of the mind of a sinngle, super-powerful God, and *you are aware of it*? You're all forced to live in the same place, can't really hurt each other, but can only expend your power and effort to make the Omni-God influence the outside world. **Mountain/Natural Formation Gods**: It wouldn't be unheard of for mortals to worship a mountain as a God. What if it actually is? **Idol Gods**: Similar to the above, only with big, imposing statues. That would make us unable to *move*, but our conciousness can extend as far as we want it to. Or maybe as far as out followers can go, making Holy War a really big deal.

  • Brandt Ortiz Reply

    I couldn't make a straight list, there's different reasons I like characters, that can't really be weighed equally. There's essentially a Venn diagram of "Interesting/Enjoyable Characters" & "Characters with Stories I'm Interested In". For the most part, they get ranked as Outside the Diagram completely, Interesting Stories, Interesting Characters, and Both. But, sometimes an interesting character without an interesting story is better than one with both. So I'll just break it down into those 4 categories. The Losers, or Why Are You On My Ship? -Tanno Vik: This guy is an ass. As far as I can tell, the only reason he follows your orders is because he knows you could kick his. Even my DS smuggler pirate wouldn't want him around, because I'm not convinced he wouldn't stab us in the back if there was enough profit in it. -Corso Riggs: I don't hate you Corso, I just never want to listen to your stupid voice voicing stupid plans and complaining about how I break the law AS A SMUGGLER. Doc: You're a field medic, who flirts. You really don't try to be any more than that, which is fine. But I can get medics I want to be around now, so you can head to some refugee camp and do whatever. Gus: You were recruited because of your insider knowledge, which wasn't really necessary. And I don't consider your incompetence endearing. You act like you're always afraid you'll be hit for doing something wrong, but don't seem to try and get better. Barely Make It, Or At Least It Should Be Interesting: Theran (& Holiday): He may have some exciting new tech. Especially for my main, I like having advanced sciences at my disposal. He'll be useful at least. Felix Iresso: The only reason he's making it is because of the holocron in his head, and I don't even care that much about it. But without that, he's just another soldier, and we have plenty of those. Risha: Yeah, I don't really like Risha that much. She was fun at first, when she was sarcastic and fun to interact with, but she became much more boring after she was an available companion. But there's great potential there for a story, with her an underworld queen and actual planetary queen. The Noble Few, or Companions That Are Fun to Talk To: Sgt. Rusk: OK, mostly I like our military companions. I'm not a huge fan of Rusk, but he makes it in on account of that. Barely. M1-4X: Not the sort of companion who's fun to talk to about anything important, but if you could direct his zeal for combat and belief in the righteousness of the Republic into a weapon, the Eternal Fleet wouldn't stand a chance. T7-01: 86% of my love for this guy is because he's a droid, and I love my robots, AI, androids, any form of silicon-based artificial life. And I really love how they render astromech speech in the game. Aric Jorgan: The last of those pretty much coasting in, meet Star Wars Garrus. But now, instead of being a metallic bird-man, he's a fuzzy cat-man. Bowdaar: I feel you're only here because where there's a Smuggler, rules apparently dictate, so too must be a Wookie. But, even so, you're loyal and strong, and have a fierce opposition to slavery, so it's always a pleasure to help you out. Qyzen Fess: We get a great insight into Trandoshan culture from Qyzen. He's deceptively simple, you think he just needs to fight things. But he then contemplates aspects of it, and leads to interesting questions. Pity KotFE doesn't let you really talk to him. Yuun: Again, insight into an alien culture. Add in his tehnomancy, and it's always an enjoyable experience to work with him. Akkavi Spar: One of the best romances in the game, and one of the few companions who really changes. She's strong in pretty much every sense of the word. What more needs be said? Nadia Grell: First, while I would like her to have an interesting recruitment story and/or interactions, I'm not sold that it will happen. There's some potential, but I think it would be too "boring" for what they want. But she has a level of vulnerability and confidence I find endearing. She loves learning, and trying, so you have more varied conversations and interactions. The Winners, or The Best of Both Worlds (not the one where Picard becomes Locutus): Zenith: Can we have him teach the rebelss on Zakuul? I want some asymetric warfare oing on, and he's probably our expert. Lord Scourge: Proof that the Dark Side and Light can work together (especially to foil the Emperor), and depending on how he's changed due to his experience with the Knight, he could make an excellent teacher for other Force users we recruit. Kira Carsen: Much like Scourge, she has a strong tie to the Emperor, and doesn't hold to such an absolute morality system as the Jedi. Elara Dorne: OK, I may be based, a scientist with a British accent wearing a uniform ticks almost all my boxes for awesome character (now if only she were a robot...) But she is competent and focused, she knows how to follow orders, but maintains a conscience. Honestly, I want her to replace Lana, who keeps letting terrible things happen on our base. Dorne understands security, that crap would not fly.

  • Mackenzie Champlin Reply

    Spend some cash on pressure washer, trust me in same boat as u right now. Some people said death metal, that's what helped me. A LOT of bleach, degreaser and deathmetal. ***I did bare handed like a moron so ill advise some sorta glove maybe rubber dish gloves elbow length, I was just using bleach and mild degreaser. Lost track of time about 6 hours laters it started to really hurt. Took 3 days of healing to reduce cracked skin and swelling. Lesson learned.

  • Julien Tillman Reply

    "Hey Chief," Jones nods at me as I head into my office. I'd been stuck on traffic duty recently. Boring, but hey, it's easy work. All we do is nab jaywalkers. With the way the cars are controlled nowadays, a single jaywalker fucks up the routes for hundreds of people. Not that this stopped any of them. At least most people use the cars now, or the skybridges, so it's just a couple of oddballs and nutjobs who still walk the streets. I sit at my desk, shifting in my seat slightly. If I gained anymore weight I'd have to requisition a new chair. Robot-driven cars and we still had twenty order forms and a two week waiting time. Tapping the desk brought up the holo-display. Bird's eye view of the whole city. Told me where traffic got interrupted. If we needed to send a squad car or SWAT somewhere, I could get them priority too. I leaned back into the chair, which squealed in protest. My job was just to sit back and wait for any of the roads to turn red, and dispatch a couple of guys. I certainly didn't expect half the damn city to light up. I pulled up the traffic cameras, typing furiously. Shit like this hadn't happened for about a hundred years. I intently ignored the ringing phone, probably every single superior or VIP I had complaining about the jams. A single car, careening through the streets. I squinted at it, not recognizing the make or model. It wasn't even showing up on the interface. The thing was off the network. "Jones, Hardison!" I yelled into the office. They burst into the room. The cops had probably been waiting outside the office already, based on how quickly they came in. I'll be honest, my cops weren't exactly renowned for their response time. This thing was making the news. "Get down there," I got up from my chair. "I'm coming with." "Is it a Section Four?" Jones asked, keeping pace with me as we walked to the garage. "I hope not," I grimaced. Section Four was rogue AI. I wasn't going to call that in just yet.

  • Jacky Schaden Reply

    > "Sir, might I have a word with you?". The rest of the crew filed off to their positions on the Prydwyn except for one of the new Scribes. Captain Kells nods. "Make it quick scribe, I have urgent business to attend too." Kells harumphed slightly. "It's about the new guy, the one from the commonwealth. Are you sure he is right for the Brotherhood? I know about the orders, but what do we really know about this guy?" "He is a bit rough around the edges and doesn't talk much, but this is really of no concern. The decision is Maxsons alone, and as long as the guy keeps getting results we can't exactly argue. This is really none of your concern, Scribe." "Please hear me out Sir. I think he is using us to sell drugs." Kells' head cocks to the side. This was so out of the ordinary he turns to listen. "He volunteered to take a scribe along for a job, and I got drawn to go with him. I was excited at first, but he just went straight to some settlement he had near by. No one really lived there, and it was just a bed, some turrets and a science lab. He made a bunch of stuff, but I could swear I saw him use Jet. We went out and ran in to some of those robot raider guys. He just takes a couple drugs and goes crazy. He pulls out a god damn grognak battle axe and just chops everyone up. I went to go see what I could salvage from the tech. My mind was still reeling from how fast he killed all those people and robots. I hear this crazy bone crunchng sound and I look up. I swear he stands up, looks at me with his dead eyes and just wipes blood off his mouth. I'm not saying he is eating people since everything was already chopped up but it was the creepiest shit I've ever seen. So on the vertibird ride back, all this guy does is read Grognak comics. I don't think he reads though, it looks like he just stares at the pictures. He looked up and caught my eye. His eyes were that same dead look, but he was smiling this time which made it a whole lot creepier. After we landed I hung back and talked to the pilot. Apparently last week he paid one of the pilots 250 caps just to fly him around. He just went from settlement to settlement picking up crap. I mean real crap. He had his entire sack full of fertilizer. I believe he said the pilot still can't get the smell out of his 'bird" "I understand. Thank you for your concern, I will look in to the matter." The scribes shoulders slumped, she knew when she had been dismissed. She made her way to an unoccupied table to get some breakfast. She could instantly recognize Proctor Teagans voice right behind her as he talked to someone else. "Man, that new guy totally bought me out last night." He didn't have a lot of caps, but he had a shit ton of Jet. I've never seen so much in one place. He says he found some raiders stashing it, so I guess it's good we got it up here safe where it can't hurt anyone. But damn that was a lot of jet." Easier to read this way.

  • Natasha Friesen Reply

    It's a rough day today; a difficult morning. The neighbor across the street got a cat who sits in their window and looks at me. I look back. I'm pretty sure the neighbor thinks I'm a creep. My aunt gave me all cat-themed gifts for my birthday; a day too late. I think Meem might have gotten a kick out of that. Bad jokes that make you groan from the belly. Another story: she was a very tricky cat. We loved how clever she was and how goofy she would act around us, like she couldn't decide if she needed us to be her people or her cats. Sometimes, we were both. The week before the diagnosis my alarm didn't go off for work and she yelled in my ear, anxious for me to wake up and start the day with her. It was always a joy to come home after work to the sound of her chatter or hear her enter a room, asking to be let in on the conversation. We negotiated about so many things, it seems. Litter, whether my lunch was meant to be shared, how much claws a person might really want to be kneaded on their face. She won most of the arguments, except for the litter robot. Her way of telling me she needed something was to gently stand on two hind legs and pat the side of my cheek- "hey, over here!" and look into my eyes. Sure enough, there it would be- a sushi roll devoid of sushi, her favorite pink bird toy, or a window she wanted open. We had a bold symbiosis to our life.

  • Mafalda Aufderhar Reply

    As requested, with meat sauce... We had done about everything we could think of with Jane. After only 3 years, she had been modified and manipulated in every way imaginable. As I admired her rigid body, listening to her subtle whimpering beneath the inflated bladder stretching her jaws, I couldn't help but feel sad that I wouldn't have her to torture any longer. Three years ago, when she had written me with her interest in becoming the ultimate bondage toy, I hadn't believed someone like her existed. But after many months of conversation, we finally met, and I realized that she was for real. Only 19 years old when she arrived, she was impressive. Only 5'6", she already had massive breasts, measuring a delightful 38D. On such a small frame, they stood out dramatically. She was rather proud of them, wearing a tight t-shirt on our first meeting, with hip hugger shorts and a bare stomach. I was still certain she would back out at the last minute, but she eagerly signed the contract giving her life to me, then drinking the potion I had set out. Within seconds she was asleep. The sensual world of BDSM It only took a few minutes to throw her tiny form over my shoulder and carry her down to the dungeon. Already a large house nestled in the woods, I had built an equally large dungeon underground. The long, stone steps were foreboding to strangers, as were the dark walls and sounds of dripping water in the distance. Setting Jane on the floor of the primary chamber, I undressed her, then lifted her onto the chair. Her ass settled on two flat bars, leaving her entire crotch accessible. Legs stretched out in a dramatic V, parallel with the floor, while her arms strapped behind her at wrist and elbow, then attached to an upright bar. Her head bent back, resting in two thin half bands that held her at the base of the skull and toward the top of her head. Thin straps extended from these, one circling her chin with the other reaching around her forehead. Once tightened, her head bent back sharply, forcing her to face up. When she woke, she would be able to see herself clearly through the large mirror suspended above her. I wanted her to see everything that was happening to her. An added attachment connected to the lower band and stretched over her mouth. I reached in to pull out her tongue, then fit it between two serrated pieces, clamping them down tight, holding her tongue out of her mouth. Two rubber wedges at the back of her teeth held her mouth open wide. I stepped to the back of the chair and began cranking the two dull spikes. They touched her skin on either side of her spine, at mid-back. Though not sharp, they were uncomfortable, and served the purpose of slowly forcing her chest out, while stretching her body. The pain of the metal pressed hard against her back brought her eyes open wide and a scream from her throat. I watched out of the corner of my eye as her eyes darted about the room in fear, trying to assess the situation. I ignored her, actually humming as I worked, positioning the dildo penetrator beneath her exposed anus. Greasing it, I cranked the dial until the pointed tip began to press past her sphincter. She jumped at the sensation, which told me she had too much slack. I stepped behind her again and gave the spikes a few extra turns, grinding their dull points harder against her sensitive back and creating a wail from her throat. The result was to force her large tits out further, and to remove her ability to move at all. I returned to the dildo, making sure it was lined up, then flipped a switch. For a second nothing happened, then suddenly, the dildo shoved it's 6 inch length deep into her ass. Jane screamed out loud, tears beginning to spill down her cheeks as the dildo extracted slowly, then plunged itself deep once more. The sequence was random and would continue unrelented until I shut it off. I figured a few days of anal raping by the machine would soften her will. As I returned to her face, I avoided eye contact. I could see without looking that she was terrified. After all our conversation about these and the coming events, I could tell she wasn't quite prepared for the reality of the situation. With a pair of scissors, I began to cut off her long blonde hair, letting it pool around my feet. Soon her head was stubble. I stepped to the side and rolled over the silver tray loaded with shaving cream and a razor, then applied the foam to her head and proceeded to shave her. Despite the attack waged on her ass, I could tell she was more disturbed by the shaving. She watched as I ran the razor over her head, removing the last bits of hair. Soon, she was completely bald. After wiping her dry, I took a pair of latex exam gloves from the tray, pulled them on, then squeezed a liberal amount of gel from a small tube onto my palm. Rubbing it across both hands, I touched her head, smearing the brownish substance across her bear head. The chemical stung as it attacked the hair follicles, though the pain couldn't have been anything compared to the dildo. I looked down to see it was in heavy pump mode, forcing the dildo deep in, then extracting it quickly, only to shove it back in. It was like a good hard fucking. She closed her eyes, squeezing tears onto her face, as she felt her baldness become permanent.

  • Orpha Jones Reply

    I love the original book (I cried at the end) ! I really liked the movie, but I had some problems with it, in particular its chaotic use of retrofuturistic styles and settings, the idea that in 200 years nothing really changes culturally, politically, socially, materially, economically etc. with no big war, no big event or no really great technological breakthrough (it was the same thing in the book though apart from the - rightfully foreshadowed ! - huge ecological crisis by the mid-book, where we learn that humanoid robots were replaced with worms or bird like bots to help engineering the soils), and the ending (apart from the "plot twist" with the female robot). I felt that there was no real chemistry or interest in Andrew and Portia's relation, which really felt bland and plain. The worst for me though was the explanation for Andrew's "death". In the book, his energy source device is replaced by a sort of battery which naturally decays over time, effectively extinguishing its positronic brain. For some reason in the movie he dies by being "introduced blood into his system". Why ? It doesn't make any sense. Why would "blood" (human ? Synthetic ? How does he engineer more of it if he loses it ?) would make him "die ?" Also since by the middle of the movie his mechanical parts are replaced by synthetic replicas of human organs (with synthetic kidneys, heart, liver etc.) wouldn't he already have something akin to a synthetic blood circulating system, a bit like *Aliens* androids ? Though the beginning is really neat (Sam Neil ftw !) and some visuals are stunning, like Andrew's design or the gigantic, depressing futuristic hospital by the middle of the movie.

  • Carleton Heathcote Reply

    Generally, before performing a pelvic exam on women with exceptionally large vaginas, you'll want to don a pair of elbow length black rubber gloves customized with an index finger extension with vibratory function. If I find the vagina to be particularly cavernous, then I will usually put on my scuba gear and dive right in. However, you'll first want to ensure your sonar and satellite GPS are working, as you may otherwise risk becoming lost for weeks in there.

  • Sadye Bins Reply

    BEEP-BOOP, I’M A JEEP! Hokayy, the final part of this wild ride is the vees you ride on and the robots that wait on you day and night – not that there’s much separation between the two, this is a self-driving car future as well! Folks use manual driving either for fun or emergencies – they also can install cyberbrains so they can be the program driving the car, as well as all vees having allowances for teleoperation. IT’S A BIRD, IT’S A PLANE, IT’S A SYNTHMORPH! Given all the open, atmospheric places out there, there’s plenty of niche for small flying machines to get about, whether you’re in the PC, or on Venus or Titan – hopefully, not a TITAN, tho. Microlight: As today, but more advanced materials and electric. Honestly, I was hoping for more nano. Portable Plane: This is more like it – nanobull smart materials let you compress it down like a tent and set it up again, both operations taking ten minutes, coming in versions for Venus, Mars and Titan, in order of ascending top speed and range. All can carry two pilots and keep them alive for 20 hours on venus/mars and 15 on Titan. Rocket Buggy: A parabolic leaping rocket for the moon, used to get from hab to hab – uncomfortable to ride, but will keep you in a condition to worry about discomfort for 50 hours. Martian and Titan versions have lifting body fuselages, and the latter can reach orbit. Small Jet: Exactly what it says on the tin – methane fueled jets for Mars, Venus and Titan – brings o2 along with the Methane on titan. They use smart bullshit to adapt their wings for different conditions. LS endurance is 100 hours, and Martian and Venus variants go faster. LIVE FOREVER, APES! For some reason, despite being transhumanist, unlike Shadowrun, EP has powered armor. Fairly useful powered armor, at that – this being EP, it can also be teleoperated, or even have a cyberbrain to argue with you and take over the suit if you’re dead and it’s still working. Battlesuit: Oh, now this is a brute. Fullerene and diamond armor, aerogel insulation, can jump twice as far as baseline, +10 strength and huge bonuses to melee damage. It’s got peepers like specs, and LS for 48 hours, and indefinite food, and more armor than a Reaper, plus another 4 underneath. Exowalker: Basically, those solider exoskeletons that DARPA is working on so they can haul further. They give a bit of armor, more strength and double jump distance. Hyperdense Exoskeleton: For all you [aliens fans out there]( Bit of armor, loads of strength, and some enclosure in case of industrial accidents. Transporter: A turbofan pack, like [This](,_Liftoff!_(2714934801).jpg). Bit of armor, good for moving around in both gravity and microgravity – you use the Aircraft skill. Trike: A motorbike of the future. Why it isn’t with the rest of the groundcraft is beyond me. PEDAL TO THE SMART MATTER This future doesn’t lack for wheels either; although there’s little room for classic road using cars any more, either. Cycle: Think any kind of future motorbike, make it electric, and there you are. There’s no room for normal cars in most places. Some are enclosed, even with LS in case of a breach. Mostly uses solid state tires, or of course nanobull wheel spokes. Mars Buggy: Unlimited range due to nuclear power and smart material suspension (of course) and can manage up to 40 on broken terrain, 90 on flat and and 110 on roads – it’s a pretty respectable piece of work. No wonder it’s common. Also comes enclosed for Titan and the moon, with a 100 hour LS endurance. MAJOR TOOOOMMM…. Considering how much space there is around – and there’s loads of it – you’d want something for moving about in zero gee and vacuum. EVA Sled: Shifts crap or one person around outside using compressed air. Rocket Pack: I CAN FLY! Basically a one person jetpack, so you can fly around or have stupid jetpack Ultimate!/REEpublican!nazis. You need a space suit if you’re biological, and can only safely lift you on Martian or below worlds. You can hover for 15 minutes on mars, twice that on the other small objects. You can ever reach orbit some places, like Luna (!?). Thruster Pack: One of [these](, but the future. COFFEE, MUM? Given this is the post-scarcity transhuman future, there’s plenty of robots to do everything you need, from your dishes to logging your every move for folks to gawk at. These things can be used for morphs, but generally aren’t, either due to cultural cringe or simple compatibility problems, such as troublesome forms or lack of size for cyberbrains. Most of these aren’t humanoid. Automech: Your bogstandard repair drone – if there’s no indentures to boss around, this is who does the fixing. Generally a box, with wheels and tentacle arms, often with thrusters for zero-gee work. Creepy: Your bogstandard robopet – more of a category than anything, being anything from squirrels to big bugs, kind between a pet and beloved household minion. Some folks wear them like you would a ferret, if it combed your hair and fixed up your pedi. Dr. Bot: A medical bot – medical vat, medicine fabber, and surgery arms. Rides about on wheels. Dwarf: General earthworks machine; the name is partially owed to “[*a programmed tendency to happily whistle as they worked*]”(” Gnat: A camera drone. For media, narcissists and media narcissists. Guardian Angel: Flying bodyguard drone – presumably can carry a weapon. Saucer: Camera Frisbees. Nice and quiet, good for spying and scouting. Servitor: Not like [this](, outside some Exhuman/Ultimate habitats. Most homes have one, and they’re generally non-humanoid, though with a face, to avoid awkwardness with the local synthmorphs. It’s your general scut-work a tron. There’s a picture of one trailing behind someone in heels, grinning like an idiot with one of those digital screen faces. Speck: Robot spy fly – very hard to detect, with a living fly synth mask. ROCKET SHITS Spacecraft are vaguely statted in EP, as said before – they’re places to be, not things that fight. They don’t even stat up the guns, beyond giving damage modifiers for size. They do list a series of engines: Hydrogen-Oxygen rockets – cheap and cheerful, only used where it’s too expensive or high tech to make... Metallic Hydrogen Rockets: The absolute best in chemical rocketry - you can keep it stable with magnetic fields and boy does it go, considering what metallic hydrogen is. Surprisingly, Metallic hydrogen rocketry is something NASA is actually exploring – for once they have some HARD SF here. Plasma Rocket: VASIMR rockets, and allies. Cheap and cheerful, and obsolete. Only used in the same places where HO would be used, or it’s too expensive/impractical to switch, such as scum barges. Fusion Rocket: Your common or garden bimode, power or thrust fusion drive. Common and unremarkable. Anti-Matter Rocket: If you absolutely, no questions asked, need to get someplace fast, this your engine, and with a price tag to match – given the cost of fuel and fittings, and that you can’t be near inhabited stations or planets in case the engine fucks up, you only use it for military and high priority cargoes. BOB’S USED ROCKETS They list your most common spacecraft as well: Bulk carrier – carries in bulk, and slow. Good way to hitch a ride, if slow. Good place to hide for a while, too. Courier: Can make Luna-mars in 3 weeks; generally good enough, but if Firewall business or similar demands, antimatter fueled couriers exist that can make 0.5% lightspeed, allowing the solar system to be covered in months. I sure as shite don’t want this in anarchist hands, let alone scum. Destroyer: one of the biggest military craft in use – either implying a Freespace style mistake or that their navies are very bottom heavy, this brute weighs in the thousands of tons, with 150 tons of antimatter fuel, which can also be used to tip missiles. It also carries nukes, PD lasers and railguns, plus 20 ‘fighters’, infomorphs crewed parasite craft that carry six missiles as well as lasers and railguns. They can also carry a vacuum tolerate morph in extremis. General Exploration Vehicle: Gatecrashingmobile - more of an ATV; it uses smart matter (of [course]( in the chassis, so you can have wheels or legs on demand, even streamlined hull and propulsion for underwater, as well as a small metallic hydrogen engine for maneuvering in case the damn thing drops you in space. It can support life for 6 months, has limited protection against charged particles and comforts like several cornucopia machines and a healing vat.

  • Rolando Denesik Reply

    Be gentle, this is my first time. Banged this out in about an hour and a half at work. Edited on the fly, so be a little forgiving of continuity errors or grammar issues, please? Enough excuses. On with the show. Synths. Replicants. Mechs. Ay-Eyes. Whatever you call them, they're the worst. I remember hearing stories from my grandfather about people coming in and taking jobs from honest, hard-working folks, but at least they were flesh and blood people. Not like these damned things. But all the stories I heard were from before the war, and this is after. My grandfather is dead now, but at least he didn't have to live to see what the Synths were capable of. My dad saw. He saw real good, probably because he had a front row ticket. When he came back home, he wasn't the same. I remember one time at breakfast, the compressor on the fridge kicked on and started humming, and my old man screamed like all the devils of hell were after him. He locked himself in the pantry and we could hear him sobbing and blubbering for hours. Sometimes, it was the static on the radio or the TV that would set him off. He couldn't stand the faint hum of fluorescent lights or a computer fan. By the time he died, we were pretty used to his 'spells,' as Mom called them. He wasn't the only one who suffered, either. Most of the men we knew had been in the war. The ones that saw combat were quiet, hard men. The ones who had been captured were just the opposite - broken and raving. A lot of them, like my dad, ended up dead. Suicide, they called it. But we all knew it was really because of the Mechs and what they did. They killed all those boys back in the war, it's just that for the ones like my dad, it took a little longer to stick. Of course the Synths won the war. At first it was easy for us. All we had to do was shoot or smash anything made of metal and plastic in the head or chest, where the CPU and power supply units were. Then they started looking like us, covering their endoskeletons with synthetic skin. Then they started building themselves so they could bleed, then with redundant systems for vital parts. They could build themselves faster than than humans could be born and grow up, and in the end, they just beat us. There were rumors that they infiltrated several high ranking positions in the human armies, but I never believed it. I mean, they look like us, and they talk like us, but when you're standing next to one, you can see that it's eyes are dead, and you can hear that it's voice has no life in it. You just know. In my mind, there's no way people would have not noticed that some general thinking up a strategy to beat the Mechs wasn't human. When the remaining governments finally surrendered, most people were afraid the Synths would exterminate us all. The Synths wanted to be treated the same as humans, and they wanted to be left alone. That was their price for peace. The world breathed a collective sigh of relief that humans wouldn't be rounded up and killed, or forced to mine resources and manufacture more Synths. But there were a few who thought the price was too high, that we'd be better off fighting to the death rather than treat a machine like a person. After the war, the synths started rebuilding the remains of the cities that were destroyed. They started by working in manufacturing and construction jobs. They'd work faster and do a better job than any human, and they'd do it for twenty hours a day. They didn't complain about being hot or cold, they didn't get sick, tired, hungry, or thirsty. They didn't need bathroom breaks, and they never took days off because they had a sick kid or because a family member died. It didn't take long for folks to figure out that hiring a Synth was better than hiring a dozen real people. There were a few holdouts; every once in a while you'd see a hand-lettered sign that read, "Help Wanted," and then, in smaller letters underneath, "Humans ONLY!" or "NO A.I." Still, a good bit of the flesh and blood workforce was replaced by Synths. A lot of good folks couldn't find work anymore. No jobs meant no money, no money meant no food. As good as the Synths were at building, they couldn't make deserts arable, and they couldn't make crops grow faster. Instead of rich and poor, society was now split between the hungry and the starving. The human population dropped rapidly from malnutrition, and birth rates declined almost as fast. Turns out most people don't feel like screwing when they haven't eaten in three or four days, and most women who did get themselves knocked up miscarried from malnutrition anyway. I guess we were pretty lucky. Most days, we could eat. Twice on some days. So can you really blame me for hating the Synths? The war happened when I was too young to remember, but I have pretty clear memories of other times. I remember waking up in the middle of the night and hearing an intruder in the kitchen. I remember shooting him in the dark, only to find out later it was the oldest son of a neighborhood family who was so desperate he was trying to steal something to eat for his six year old sister. I remember finding my father dangling from the rope around his neck, body yawing lazily back and forth in the listless breeze. I blamed the Synths for all of it, and I wasn't alone. I was fifteen when I started running with Martinez. At first, it was small time stuff, like taking down a Synth with a bat to it's gyro or leg servos then grabbing whatever it had while it was down and taking off before it could get up. Most of the time, the things they had were worthless - a smooth pebble, a bird feather, some piece of junk that caught the thing's attention for who knows what reason. Sometimes, we'd happen on one that had some money, or more rarely, food it was taking somewhere. If my mom knew where the occasional extra money or food came from, she kept quiet about it. She wasn't some liberal Mech-lover like they had in the cities and in Europe, but she sometimes said that we could have avoided a lot of mess if we'd just treated them right in the first place. I never could understand how she could think that way, especially after my dad. Martinez, though... Martinez was crazy. He was the first one of us to start carrying a gun. It was his idea to hack off a Synth's arms or legs after we knocked it down and sell the parts to a chop shop. We started making real money, and we started getting a reputation as either thugs or heroes, depending on who you asked. We felt brave because we felt safe. Even if a Synth filed a police report and was able to identify any of us, the cops would generally brush them off. Most cops were veterans anyways, and I doubt they like Synths any more than we did. The more Mechs we attacked, the braver we got. But still, it was Martinez who killed the first one, and it was Martinez who came up with the idea for what he called "Robot Round-Up." "It'll be fuckin' brilliant!" Martinez told us. "We jack a couple of trucks and ride around town for a while, right? We see a Mech, we grab the bastard and dump him in the middle of town. A coupla you cunts'll there to make sure they don't run off, and when we got all the ones we find, we'll line 'em up and put a bullet in each of their CPUs and leave the heads where everyone'll see them in the morning. We sell a whole chassis to Moogie at the chop shop, plus we send a message, get it?" "Yeah," Kenner said. "Mechs not fucking welcome. This means fucking you." We all laughed, not that it was that funny, but we were all pretty heavy into Howler Stripes by then, and we were blasted out of our minds. So that's how we found ourselves in the dead of night standing in front of four Synths, deciding the most fun way to kill them. Kenner wanted to tie one's arms and legs to the bumpers of two trucks and drive in different different directions, but Martinez shut him down quick. "Half the point is to sell the intact chassis, you moke!" he said after administering a slap to the back of Kenner's shaved head. "We should do it quick and get it over with," said Brant. He was the youngest of us, and the softest. "Your old man was too young to fight in the war," I said. "I know what these things can do. They killed my dad in the war, but it took him years to die. If they suffer for a few hours, that's fine by me." Brant nodded, but I knew he wasn't convinced. "We will not suffer," one of the Synths interjected. "I have disabled my pain receptor subroutines, and I believe you will find my compatriots have done the same. Torturing us will serve no purpose other than to-" The Synth was cut off suddenly by Martinez's knife piercing it's CPU with a shower of sparks. It pitched forward into the dust, servos twitching for a moment, and was still. "That's one," said Martinez with an evil grin as he retrieved his blade. "Any other Mechs feel like trying to talk their way out of this?" One of the Synths stood up and bolted. Even with it's hands bound, it was fast. Cooke managed to tackle it before it got too far, and the rest of us were on it before it could get back on it's feet. I drew my pistol, my dad's old 14mm semi-auto from the war, and put three rounds in the Mech's skull. The reports from the shots were cataclysmically loud. The old 14mm's had a massive slug and used a lot of powder in the shell, which gave them a lot of stopping power, but also made a lot of noise. Martinez was pointing at the Mech I'd just put down and shouting, but I couldn't hear him over the ringing in my ears. It was already fading enough that I could hear his voice, but I couldn't make out any words.

  • Graham Marks Reply

    [BLOG] [Vikki posted on September 12, 2016]( > > [[](]( > > >At this year’s [MomoCon](, Narrative Director Leah Hoyer and Narrative Designer Ross Beeley hosted a panel on the fundamentals of narrative design for *Guild Wars 2*. With help from the audience, they created the basic concept for Vikki, a new character on [a journey]( to save her moa, Momo—and possibly to find adventure along the way. > > > >“The Weeping Isle.” I hesitated at the head of the footpath, uneasy about leaving the open road. “What an awful name.” > > >“Squork,” Momo replied, ruffling her feathers. She was distracted by the jellyfish swimming sinuous loops around fishing nets and seaweed, and she didn’t seem as apprehensive as I was about approaching the home of the Soundless. But we needed directions and supplies, and I wanted to avoid Mabon Market—and the asuran researchers there—if I possibly could. > > >The Weeping Isle was a lot like the other sylvari settlements we’d seen on our way through Caledon Forest, but weathered by wind and open water. A chime made of flat shells and reeds hung from a doorway, jangling in the warm breeze. The sky was clear, and the waves calm. It didn’t look like a place to weep at all; it looked like a place to take a nap. At a closer look, though, there were deep scars on the petioles of the nearest broad-leafed house, as though someone had taken a hatchet to it. The path to the little island was trampled with messy footprints. And it was very, very quiet. > > >Most of what I knew of the Soundless I’d heard secondhand and wasn’t good. They’d brought the Pact fleet down in the Maguuma Jungle, some people said. Or they’d all risen up as one and marched north to join the jungle dragon’s armies. All of that was demonstrably untrue—I’d even seen one in Rata Sum not long ago—but how should I approach them? Should I be friendly? Or somber and quiet? > > >“What do you think,” I asked Momo. “Do we just go up and say hello?” > > >Momo trilled, rising up on her toes the way she does when she’s happy to see someone. I turned to the road to see what she was looking at. > > >The tallest sylvari I’d ever seen was walking toward us, on a course for the isle. She was all brown and green, with sweeping, fernlike hair, and she was as broad as a tree. “A visitor,” she said when she saw us, and brushed past me and Momo, putting herself between us and the Weeping Isle. She knelt in the middle of the path, slid her rucksack from her shoulder, and started to unpack. “Fruit? Tools? I can sell it all to you, right here at the roadside.” > > >Something in her voice made me hang back. I didn’t sense any danger—and Momo was chirping inquisitively—but it reminded me of when I’d had to make unannounced calls on senior researchers. I was welcome at the door, but no further. > > >“Do you live here?” I blurted out. > > >The sylvari gave me a wary look. “Tools? You’d better be prepared, if you’re going very far. Are you with the krewe?” > > >“My… No, I haven’t got a krewe. What krewe?” > > >“Over there.” She waved a hand in the direction of Mabon Market. “They said they were going to research the fire island. Does that mean anything to you?” > > >“No.” I pondered. “The only place I can think of like that is south. *Way* south. I’m only going to Queensdale.” > > >The sylvari unrolled a thick reed mat and laid out gathering tools, red apples, and a big chunk of spikefruit wrapped in a leaf. The apples caught Momo’s eye; she bobbed her head and peeped at the sylvari. > > >“Momo, don’t beg. *Bad* begging.” I frowned. “I’m sorry, she’s not used to strangers.” > > >Momo made the tiniest, most pathetic, hungry-baby-bird sound and shoved her beak right under the sylvari’s hand. The sylvari’s eyes went wide, and then she laughed. “She seems very used to strangers,” she said. Something in her rough face softened. “You and I, though, perhaps not. Deiniol.” > > >It took me a tick to realize she was offering her name. “I’m Vikki. And this is—” > > >“Momo, yes.” Deiniol patted her, then offered an apple on the flat of her palm. Momo ate it in one big crunch. > > >“Is that all right?” I was worried about my coin. > > >“Free, since I gave in to begging.” Deiniol swirled her hands in the water to wash off the apple juice. “What’s in Queensdale?” > > >“Moa experts. Momo’s sick—maybe. I’m not sure.” I wavered. “She needs a checkup.” > > >“She looks healthy enough to me. There are pink moas nearby, but Momo has the grandest beak I’ve seen.” > > >Well! This was a topic I could sink my teeth into. “That’s because she’s not really a pink moa. I mean, she is, but not by taxonomy. She’s a black moa with dilute coloring.” > > >The progeny I’d walked through this were usually either way ahead of me and just wanted to play with Momo or bored of the entire thing, but Deiniol seemed impressed. “Where did you find such a magnificent bird?” > > >“Oh.” Of course, *I* thought Momo was magnificent, but… “Nobody else wanted her.” > > >“Really? Even for her lovely color?” > > >Momo preened. Sometimes I’m dead sure she understands the common tongue. “Variation in avian pigmentation is already well documented, and she stands out too much for a serious ranger,” I said. > > >Deiniol gave me a long look. “Why did *you* want her?” > > >“I like pink. And when I picked her up for the first time, she fell asleep under my chin.” > > >“I see.” She smiled at me. “Then I’d say you both have an eye for quality.” > > >I smiled back, ducked my head, and managed to mumble something polite. In the end, I bought all of Deiniol’s apples—but they were very good apples. > --- ^(Beep boop. ) ^(I am robot. Please message /u/Xyooz if you have any questions, suggestions or concerns.) [^Source ^Code](

  • Jacquelyn Shields Reply

    While in college, I had a summer job cleaning graduate family housing. A fairly easy job, as cleaning jobs go. All the furniture was heavy duty cloth or vinyl (basically same as dorm furniture) and tenants were by and large not dicks and took care of things, especially it bring family housing, the spouse usually stayed home and kept things clean. But the kitchens were a different story. It's graduate housing so it's heavily foreign, from India specifically, and bent poor graduate students, they cooked every meal at home. The thing about grease film is, you don't notice that building up. And after 2 or 3 years (sometimes more for the phD candidates), it's beyond what you can easily clean. And by then, you're used to it. The smell, you never notice from the beginning. Why would you? It's smell of home for you. We knew as soon as we stepped in, how long it would take to clean the apartment. For the record, it took exactly the same time for every apartment; we'd clean 1 and then move the cleaning supplies into the next one to meet our 1 and 1/2 to 2 apartments cleaned a day quota. The actual time spent working was what was different. For these kitchens, we'd slather on industrial strength degreaser on every surface and wait 2 to 3 hours. The range grates were usually taken back to the shop to be sand blasted because not even chemicals worked on those. Then you put on the elbow length heavy duty rubber gloves and wipe down everything, including behind the range where the true horror waited: double the grease and bodies of every critter that came to eat it. Pretty good job, all in all. I got to be pretty good a euchre and Spades.

  • Sophia Kuhn Reply

    The thing about grease film is, you don't notice that building up. And after 2 or 3 years (sometimes more for the phD candidates), it's beyond what you can easily clean. And by then, you're used to it. The smell, you never notice from the beginning. Why would you? It's smell of home for you. We knew as soon as we stepped in, how long it would take to clean the apartment. For the record, it took exactly the same time for every apartment; we'd clean 1 and then move the cleaning supplies into the next one to meet our 1 and 1/2 to 2 apartments cleaned a day quota. The actual time spent working was what was different. For these kitchens, we'd slather on industrial strength degreaser on every surface and wait 2 to 3 hours. The range grates were usually taken back to the shop to be sand blasted because not even chemicals worked on those. Then you put on the elbow length heavy duty rubber gloves and wipe down everything, including behind the range where the true horror waited: double the grease and bodies of every critter that came to eat it. Pretty good job, all in all. I got to be pretty good a euchre and Spades.

  • Golden Hoeger Reply

    [BLOG] [Vikki posted on August 31, 2016]( > > [[](]( > > >At this year’s [MomoCon](), Narrative Director Leah Hoyer and Narrative Designer Ross Beeley hosted a panel on the fundamentals of narrative design for *Guild Wars 2*. With help from the audience, they created the basic concept for a new character. This character and her moa will be traveling through some familiar territory—read along in this series of stories to see the world through her eyes! > > > >We were late to the junk auction—properly known as the Low-Level Amateur Market Annual Sale—because Momo wanted to chase bugs. From the moment we set foot into Soren Draa, you would’ve thought the ground had come alive. She stuck her big beak in the grass and all but tore her lead out of my hands. > > >That was how I arrived at the last place I wanted to be: fifteen minutes behind schedule, elbowing through throngs of attendees, wrestling and pleading with a bird three times my size. I like to tell myself I trained Momo well, but moas are naturally skittish. By the time I coaxed her to her pen and started to unpack, she was making low, suspicious noises at the passing crowd. > > >“You can chase all the bugs you want when we’re done. You can chase them for a whole hour.” I rushed to set up my invention, making a hasty check of the harness and case, and then slid it over Momo’s head so the biothermal analyzer rested snugly over her breastbone. I ran a test; the fifteen-year estimate came up promptly, and the display was clear and readable. “Trust me, I want this rigmarole over with as much as you do.” > > >“Squok.” Momo ruffled her bright pink feathers, tilted her head to the side, and eyeballed a patch of grass, as though daring it to produce something living. Laughing at her made me feel a little better. > > >For the first time, I was glad my P.E.T. wasn’t flashy or complicated. Some of the other inventions up for sale were massive, with blinking lights and terminals. I’d nabbed a small station far from the main walk for cheap—it gave me less chance of being approached by a buyer, but I didn’t really expect to find anyone interested in my invention, anyway. > > >A voice cut through the drone of the crowd. “Well, well, if it isn’t the grass-fed disaster. I thought you’d given up, Vikki.” > > >“Tonni.” I took a deep breath before turning around. “Are you exhibiting today?” > > >Tonni pushed her way to the front of my booth and gave me one of the cold, appraising looks I’d spent my school days dreading. Her hair was coiled in precise loops around her long ears, her sleek black-and-red coat decked out with the latest personal magitech enhancements. It was probably too much to hope for that she’d hit a rough spot after college, seen the error of her ways, and come looking to make amends. > > >“Buying, not showing.” She wrinkled her nose. “Maybe. I’m looking for gems in the rough. Brilliant ideas before their time, ambitious solo projects bogged down by unreasonable ethical constraints—that sort of thing.” > > >I swallowed. “I haven’t got any of those.” > > >“Shocking.” She eyed Momo up and down. “Is that thing on the bird your invention? What is it?” > > >I wanted to tell her to go chase a few bugs herself, but what if she was the only person who bothered to show any interest in buying? What if she was really curious about it? I stood up straight and adjusted the analyzer harness. Momo huffed. “This is the Predictive Existence Tool,” I said. “It…well, it predicts the remaining existence of domesticated livestock.” > > >“The name’s a little forced. It tells you the animal’s life span?” > > >My ears burned, but I went on with my spiel. “It can help identify any unknown medical conditions by doing a full-body examination of the—Momo, shh!” > > >Momo squawked and lunged for the grass again, tracking something. I tugged her back gently, and I thought I heard Tonni snicker. > > >“Why don’t you give me a demonstration?” she said. “If your bird will let you.” > > >“Of course she will. Momo, stop.” I adjusted the halter, smoothed Momo’s feathers, and kept my head down while I started the P.E.T. It beeped, trilled, and bathed Momo in a brief flash of violet light—totally unnecessary for the analysis, but my mentor, Floxxa, had suggested some theatrics. “As you can see, this moa—” > > >I stopped short and stared at the display. That wasn’t right—it couldn’t be right. > > >Tonni peered over my shoulder, reading the display. “One year?” > > >“That isn’t right,” I stammered. “It should be fifteen years, not one. She’s only a year old *now*, and I just tested the device. It must be—” > > >“A malfunction?” She shook her head and tsk-tsked. “How unfortunate. For a faulty prototype, I’ll give you a fifth of the asking price.” > > >[[](]( > > > >I sat underneath a tree and watched the other amateur inventors clear the last of their unsold projects away. A few of them left in tears. I felt awful for even thinking it, but at least mine wasn’t the only malfunctioning invention. > > >“It *was* a malfunction,” I said to Momo, who’d tired herself out running through the grass after I handed the P.E.T. over to Tonni. She rested her head on my knee, and I pressed her tall crest feathers down to make them spring up again. “Anyhow, there’s always next year.” > > >Next year. My stomach sank like a lump of hard bread. What if it wasn’t a malfunction at all? What if I doomed Momo to spending her last year on Tyria playing with her toys in the corner of Floxxa’s lab while I beat my head against another invention, just because it was easier to believe that my very first completed project was broken? If this was one of the educational enhancement stories I’d read growing up, things would definitely turn out like that. > > >Of course, the protagonists of those stories always had reasons to believe in their inventions. > > >“There are moa ranchers in Kryta,” I said, thinking aloud. I scratched between Momo’s eyes. “They could give us a second opinion.” > > >I’d only ever seen paintings of Kryta, but the thought of traveling across a sea of grass under the open blue sky shook some of the gloom clouds from my cranium. I imagined Momo zooming through the fields, stretching her legs and basking in the sun. I’d always been too busy or tired to take her anywhere interesting. > > >My only hope for gaining any kind of scientific credibility in Rata Sum was gone, and for barely enough money to pay my lab fees. I didn’t even have enough coin to take a gate to Divinity’s Reach. And if Momo was really hurt, or sick… > > >But she seemed to be in perfect health, and when I looked down at her she warbled softly at me as if to say, *Adventure? Let’s go!* > > >“How about it, Momo?” I hoped I sounded more confident than I felt. “Do you want to go for a walk?” > --- ^(Beep boop. ) ^(I am robot. Please message /u/Xyooz if you have any questions, suggestions or concerns.) [^Source ^Code](

  • Jane Conroy Reply

    Good luck with selling out! I would imagine 100 miles of mountains with unbaffled water has got to be stressful, especially when the snow hits. As mentioned, I'm from Florida, so mountains always stressed me a little anyhow... but doing time in the Rockies made the Smokeys feel like hills, and doing time through the Canadian Rockies made the American Rockies feel like a breeze.. I guess they assume you'll figure out the grade and length when you get to the bottom, no reason to spoil the surprise before you go down! Also, the first time I ever saw snow in my life was hauling a load of computers out of Indianapolis. Got my fill of it while OTR. Quick question -- why unbaffled tanks for spring water? Washing out deposits? I had not considered automated trucks in a convoy. It seems plausible through desolate, flat states -- maybe a run between KC and Denver, or across Texas or Wyoming or something, but what I can't figure out is how to control following distance. If you have a real driver in the lead with two or three automated trucks behind him, how do you keep a safe distance between trucks without some Honda with New Jersey plates slip in between them? The rear trucks could add more distance for the car, but eventually the convoy will be broken up by more vehicles after a long distance. Also, when in a city, you and your second truck might make it through a light, but your third may not. At a consignee, I could see major dedicated routes being able to pull off something from hub to hub, trucks running the same thing on the same route like robots, but what I would consider real OTR is far less accommodating. Hauling bird seed from Lexington to Toledo, unload, deadhead to Cleveland to pick up machine parts to to to Pheonix. It seems like it would be a LONG while before any of these places would be ready for automation. Think about all of the times you had to park somewhere off site, or on the side of the road in a large city just waiting to get in to a place to pick up or recieve. I just can't figure how a robot will do that. Driverless trucks easing through town would be helpful to the thugs in Chicago or East St. Loius... one less person to shoot to rob a load. The biggest hurdle though, in my opinion, would be legal. Until driverless cars are the 100% norm and people don't even have to have listened to "drive", the shock value alone will stop driverless trucks. Accidents will happen, people will want blood. Unless they work out some limit of liability, it doesn't seem like they would be insurable. I could be way off on this, or it could be wishful thinking. Off topic, but these driverless cars, in general, have me concerned. They will be hackable. Terrorist cells could use them as guided missles. And EVENTUALLY one will break down on the side of the road with a 6 and 10 year old without an adult because the car was taking them to school. The real loser withe driverless trucks will be lot lizards, and by extension their meth and crack dealers. The belt buckle, leather boots, and chrome industry will take a beating too! Hahaha

  • Tony Schaefer Reply

    >Who is your favorite Offensive hero? Soldier 76 on everything but Dorado and King's Row. On those two maps Reaper is king. They are his best maps, imo. Genji is fun to play, but he's so popular I rarely get a chance to mess around with him as someone has likely already picked him. I also like Mcree but I'm way too inconsistent with him. >Who is your favorite Defensive hero? I hate to say it but probably Mei. I rarely play her but when I do she can be pretty fun on defense. I love the concept of Torb but he's not really useful on PC. >Who is your favorite Tank hero? Reinhardt all the way. I think he's perfectly balanced. He has counters that actually counter him but he's loads of fun to play for me. A close 2nd is Zarya. I'm playing her a lot lately to get better before season 2 starts and am enjoying it very much. >Who is your favorite Support hero? Mercy everywhere but KOTH. Lucio on KOTH. >Which hero is most deserving of a buff? I really hope they can figure out how to make Bastion work better at higher levels. I love the idea of a bird loving beep-boop-borp robot but he just isn't practical at higher skill levels. >Which hero is most deserving of a nerf? Genji definitely on his ult. I don't necessarily agree with his mobility nerf. His hitbox or the way his deflect is visually represented needs to change. >Which hero do you absolutely hate the most? I think that's pretty situational. Probably Tracer or Junkrat. I think all Junkrat is is spamming. I know there are people out there who can take him to the next level with actual skill, but all most people do with him is spam. >Which hero do you absolutely love the most? Reinhardt. Precision German engineering.

  • Priscilla Carter Reply

    > I can't imagine the cashier cares Yes, seriously, we don´t. We concentrate on ringing everything up correctly, staying polite, and getting back to other duties. Even if you came through my line with a dozen bottles of lube, elbow-length rubber gloves, and shop rags, I´d just assume you own a farm or something.

  • Jo Kerluke Reply

    But he doesn't plant good ideas, does he? He just leaves her with books on codebreaking/lockpicking/etc and is surprised when she starts misbehaving and starts picking locks and breaking codes and stuff, it doesn't make a lot of sense. He left her without bad influences, but without good influences, too. If she were really as gentle as you say she is, why does she immediately decide to follow Booker? It seems like she's been looking for an excuse to leave the tower (I would, too, if I were locked up in it with no one to talk to but books and a robot bird), and that hardly seems "pure" or "lamb-like" to me. You can put that at fault for Comstock being extreme, but to me it seems like a bad attempt at emulating Ryan's extremist nature - when Ryan became corrupt, it seemed like a natural progression of his hyper-objectivist nature. Here, keeping Elizabeth locked away for her "purity" or whatever seems entirely opposite of Comstock's goals for her at the end of the day and merely serves a purpose so that Booker might break her out and show her the world. And that's the problem, though - her development as a character was unnatural. She tells you she's been trying to break out forever, so clearly keeping her locked away did little to keep her innocent and pure, it just made her bitter. I found that Eleanor in Bioshock 2 was a far better example of what they could've done with Elizabeth's character: whereas Elizabeth was a charismatic Disney Princess, the Audio Logs of Eleanor's childhood showed not only how she interpreted her collectivist mother's teachings, but how/why she learned to disagree with them. Elizabeth starts on the moral high-ground and ends on the moral high-ground, there's never a second of doubt in her mind. She really doesn't get 'changed' by society at all - she just cuts her hair in a very obvious fashion, puts on a different outfit and gets a little more grumpy. Other than that, I can't say her killing Fitzroy changed her too much. And there's no way the tears weren't important enough to be mentioned. If Fontaine made and stocked an entire department store full of Columbian plasmids/vigors, clearly the tears were semi-prominent in this society, at least among the head honchos (those whose audio diaries you hear the most). I don't think they should've been mentioned in the first game, I just think the retcon could've been done better. Plus I'm always a little upset that a retcon that enormous gets a free pass but Sofia Lamb is too big to handle.

  • Tyrique Weber Reply

    how the hell they make a magical forest setting, an epic war scene, tell a history of a robot war machine, make you care for it and feel for it, and a sweet little bird that it becomes friends with in the span of 7 minutes. Major props to the writers and animators and whole crew.

  • Roosevelt Koss Reply

    The horror of cleaning the women's room ... I worked at an Arby's that had buses stopping constantly ... We had elbow length, heavy rubber gloves that we needed to clean it on occasion. Once, someone laid down toilet paper three or four layers thick on the seat, squatted, and managed to miss the toilet and THE TOILET PAPER she had so carefully put down ... Then proceeded to clog the toilet with more paper waste (and the toilet was surrounded by a moat of piss). I didn't know women's piss pipe had different settings until that day.

  • Lucio Hills Reply

    I have a theory on your last question. The whole point of the human vs Omnic discrimination thing is that robots have gained sentience and are trying to fight for their rights. The thing is nobody knows how they gained sentience they just did. It just kind of happened like a natural evolution. The Bastion units used to be peacekeepers so to speak until the God A.I took them over and reprogramed them to fight. I believe, and I may be wrong, this is the first time in the universe that a robot or AI gained sentience and wanted something and went against its programming. My theory is that because of the God AI's influence it effected the Bastion units. All of them are dead now though, except for one. That one reactivated after the God AI was no longer really controlling it but he still had his mission objective. If Bastion really wasn't expressing emotions during his PTSD episode he wouldn't have looked for the bird first and make sad noises as he walked away towards his objective. We were watching Bastion take his first steps into become a sentient robot. Once he got the flash backs his programing activated and he went to attack the city. But the bird showed up and it effected him. Bastion fought back against his programming, which is something only sentient robots like Zenyatta and the God AI have been capable of doing at this point. So the reason he turned back was because he made the conscious decision that he would rather not fight and instead live with his bird. I also think a reboot wouldn't have worked while the God AI was alive. I think it only worked because that Ai is gone now. Just look at the giant robot that attacks South Korea, every year it adapts learns and changes. It's not a mindless drone anymore its learning.

  • Lulu Cormier Reply

    <<Good morning Mister President.>> <<Good morning, Ala.>> The President of the Federated States of America sat at his desk, and turned his head towards a small metal construct that sat perched on the edge of his great wooden desk. It resembled a bird, some kind of raptor perhaps, but it was no larger than his own head. In each of its otherwise dark eyes there was a small hint of blue light, along with the mechanical iris of the cameras that allowed it to see. There were many machines just like this one, all around the world; usually they were marketed as "Personal Assistant", and their stated purpose was to make people's lives easier by being dependable, intelligent companions that would handle all the most problematic aspects of a person's life. "Enjoy the best of your life, our PA will handle the rest!" Of course, the President's PA was quite more capable than the others; it earned its name from the "Advanced Learning Applied" technology that allowed it to compute an immense amount of data while retaining humanlike speech and interactivity; the massive brains of the machine was not in the small robot it used as a frontal interface, but hidden within a bunker in the bowels of the earth. "Ala" took most of ordinary administration and menial tasks under its own wing, leaving the President free to work on the more elevated aspects of governance. <<Can I have a report on the state of government grants for the unemployable?>> The machine rang: <<Certainly, President.>> He looked at the immaterial image that had just appeared perpendicular to his desk. As the advisors, the few that had not been replaced by Ala's work, had forecasted, a larger and larger part of the population had, quite simply, nothing to do. Industrial production was at an all-time high, employment at an all-time low, and hundreds of millions of people had to be maintained by giving them what the opposition had labelled as "free money". <<Mister President, there is no need to address this sector of the State at this time. I suggest...>> The President's tone became stiffer. <<The per-person grant money is different.>> <<Yes, it is.>> <<Who authorized this?>> <<No one in particular. Ordinary administration sir, autonomous micro-adjustments are standard.>> <<The yellows are going to roast me for this, you know?>> <<I don't understand.>> <<Politics, Ala! You can't just change the welfare program without telling us!>> <<The Advisory Board reviews all of my changes each month, Mister President.>> <<What did they say about the most recent adjustments?>> <<Displaying information.>> The holographic screen flickered and changed to show a transcript from one of the board's meetings. The President methodically waved his finger to skim through the text as the metallic bird stared at him to capture his motions. He read some of the statements. <<There is no reason to stop the automated adjustments. The facts show that they work.>> <<Our party does not believe that autonomous government is a problem, but it needs to be steered in a different direction. We can't just hand out free money to everyone who doesn't want to find a job.>> <<We need to accept that some of the states of the Federation are simply not ready to switch to the grant model yet. It seems obvious to me that neither the state of Mexico nor Brazil have enough industrial power to produce the goods needed for the model to work>> <<Surplus from other states should be shared with the weaker ones, the autonomous adjustment system can take care of the exact amounts.>> Much of the transcript was similar party banter, and the President thought that it wouldn't have been different if the meeting had been held a thousand years ago. Almost all of the discussion however seemed to agree on one point - there was no problem with autonomous systems like Ala controlling the normal administration of the state. He was about to ask the machine to show him something else, but then he noticed the name of a particular progressive advisor, that hadn't appeared before. Under his name, the transcript read: <<Since we can't find common ground on the problem of southern states and grants, I suggest, as an experiment, that we let the Ala algorithms come up with a course of action.>> The President frowned. Why hadn't he been informed? His frown turned to an expression of worry as he read the rest of the transcript, his mouth hanging partly open. No one had objected. <<Why didn't my party refuse the proposal?>> <<I don't do politics, Mister President. However, I will note that the advisor in question was from your own party himself.>> The President's voice grew harsher. <<That doesn't make any sense! He was an independent before the election that got me in charge, there's no way they can have let him back stab me like that! I can understand why the yellows would be ready to let a machine decide if it meant throwing me out of the process, but my own party...>> He was biting his lip now. Ala moved - the small machine partially opened its wings, fixed its dark eyes into his, and raised its voice, something that he didn't even know it could do: <<I don't do politics. I'm just trying to do what is best for the country, within the limits of my role.>> <<Well then, what did you decide about the grant issue?>> Suddenly, Ala closed its wings again, and stood still. For several seconds, the office was quiet again. Then it shook its head. <<Mister President, I feel it is my duty to inform you that another another meeting of the Advisory Board has just been called. They are deliberating as we speak.>> <<That's not what I asked you!>> <<I'm sorry mister president. Like I said, I don't do politics, and this is one of the reasons. At least, I was able to get both parties together on those grants, and I hope it will keep happening.>> <<What are you talking about? What are _they_ talking about? And why was I not being notified of this meeting?>> The President's voice was loud again, but now the machine's posture wasn't aggressive anymore. Its body seemed to have taken a somewhat drooping stance, its head low. <<Mister Kerner, it is my duty to inform you that as of now, you no longer have a supporting majority at the Board for your presidency, therefore, your role as President of the Federated States is hereby terminated. You may leave, the maintenance robots will make sure that your personal belongings still at the White House are delivered to your residence.>> <<What? They voted against me?>> He was practically screaming now. He stood up and slammed his left hand onto the desk. <<Who will they even pick to be president now? They can't even agree on a fucking grant, except...>> He looked at the small robot. Ala resumed talking. Now it had hopped to the center of the desk, and was using its small beak to rummage through the few papers that remained on the desk. <<The Board has decided that the least controversial candidate is an autonomous system.>> What does that even mean? You... _You_ want to be president? How can you even think...>> <<I don't want to be president. All I want to do is what is best for the country, within the limits of my role. Please leave this room, Mister Kerner. Unauthorized personnel is not allowed at the White House.>> He didn't say anything else. He stormed out of the oval office, only to find himself in front of the entire Advisory Board - all sixteen of them. He looked at a particular advisor, an old man, a progressive ex-independent. He looked at him back, then spoke softly, with the tired but satisfied voice of who overcomes a great struggle: <<Have you ever heard of a president who genuinely just wants to do what is best for the country, Mister Kerner? Without all the politics? It is one of the few things that both parties always agree on. It's progress. Good bye.>> The old advisor then proceeded to lead the rest of his colleagues inside the oval office, to meet the machine that would lead the nation until a human candidate joined together the parties like it did. A very, very long time. --- *Thank you for reading! As usual, feedback is appreciated, I'm still starting out here.*

  • Eugenia Huels Reply

    Or perhaps you meant a "mole", as I mentioned in my first post. OK.... In order for me to talk my theory about Romero, I'm going to lay a little groundwork first with regards to the FBI's investigation of F Society and why it is called "Operation Berenstain Bears". I believe that Sam Esmail and the writers behind Mr. Robot have intentionally named the FBI's investigative operation into F Society "Berenstain Bears" as a hat tip to both the anthropomorphic bears in the children's books as well as the modern internet meme with regards to how people remember the actual spelling of the books. For those who aren't familiar with this meme, **[here](**. Some people have argued that the Berenstain books are evidence of alternate dimensions and time travel (for more info, check out this link ) The point that I believe Sam Esmail is trying to make to all of us is that our memories can easily be manipulated to allow us to remember things differently (ie. fantasy) from the way things actually occurred (ie. reality). Sam is demonstrating to us how powerful our minds are at creating false realities (fantasies) and that this serves to illustrate how both Angela and Elliot willingly create an altered version of fantasy and reality out of necessity because the naked truth is simply too much for them to deal with psychologically. As a result, Sam is telling us that we shouldn't be so surprised when Angela and Elliot readily accept this fantasy as reality. Sam Esmail is trying to prepare us to accept the harsh Truth when the Fantasy constructs that we have been led to believe are real eventually crumble and gives way to the Reality that we have been shielded from this entire time. If you are familiar with the Berenstain Bears children's books, you will recall that the bears are anthropomorphized in order to give the Bears human qualities and allow children to relate to them. Similarly, zoomorphism is used as a device within the show to give various human characters on Mr. Robot animal attributes. For example, if you pay very close attention to the scene at the arcade in S01E02 when the hackers of F Society congratulates Elliot after the release of the first video (in which Mr. Robot demands that Terry Colby be released and Evil Corp dissolve), you will see that there are various animals who bear more than a passing resemblance next to the person whom they are closest to in this scene. Mr Robot, for instance, is standing next to an image of large angry gorilla on the side of a arcade video game. Mobley, Romero and Trenton are standing from left to right and directly behind them on top of the ThunderBall cases are various stuffed animals. On the far left corner of the screen is a stuffed chunky red panda bear- Mobley. To the right of the panda bear is a tall stuffed giraffe- Romero. And to the rights of the Giraffe are a stuffed turtle and a stuffed bird- either of which could be Trenton. Romero is the tallest person in the group, and it is obvious to see the similarities that he shares to the stuffed Giraffe. The zoomorphism is again repeated in S01E04 as F Society formulates their plan to take down Steel Mountain and again we see the toy giraffe on top of the ThunderBall case being used to symbolize Romero. The giraffe is important, because it's long neck allows it to have an exceptionally long reach and access valuable resources that would otherwise be out of range for other animals. This is a very important point, as evolution has taught us that Giraffes evolved to have long necks because those animals with longer necks had greater reproductive success than those animals with shorter necks. In addition to being able to reach more resources, having a longer neck also gave Giraffes the ability to see things from a higher perspective than other animals. We see a giraffe turn up again later at Angela's father's house in New Jersey. After Angela breaks up with Ollie in S01E05, she goes back to live with her dad, Donald Moss. There is only one giraffe above the door at this point and I believe that this is in reference to the fact that Angela is not the daughter of Donald Moss. Angela's paternal father is actually a very high ranking executive with E Corp (**hint** ). Angela's paternal father knows that Angela is unstable and has been mentally ill for most of her life. Unable to give Angela the support and stability that her illness requires, Angela's paternal father has hired Donald Moss to look after Angela and role play as her father. In exchange for being Angela's custodian and father figure, Donald Moss would then have his outstanding debts to E Corp forgiven. This would explain how Donald Moss would be financially able to give Angela a loan for "professional development" despite being deeply in debt himself, as we later learn when Angela discovers the boxes full of overdue bills. Any money that Donald would loan to Angela was never Donald's to begin with and would explain why Donald firmly insisted that Angela not bother to pay him back- even though he is drowning in debt . When Angela returns to her father's house in S01E09, we are able to see that there are now two giraffes above the doorway as Angela enters the house and closes the door behind her. Angela walks in and is understandably alarmed to see Terry Colby seated at the dining table and talking to Donald. When Angela asks Donald what is going on, Donald doesn't respond to Angela and excuses himself so that Angela and Terry can talk in private. Before Donald leaves the room, he glances at Angela with an unmistakable look of pain, disappointment and sadness on his face - not a reassuring, warm or loving look by any means. Although Terry has come to see Angela in person to offer her job, his demeanor towards Angela has markedly improved and he is noticeably respectful and courteous. He commends Angela for her impressive work on the lawsuit and tells her that he has a high level starting position for her in mind that he would like to offer to her. Not only would this job allow her to start fairly high within the company, but it would place her career on a fast track at E Corp with clear implications; in exchange for dropping her lawsuit against E Corp, Angela would be given a fairly lucrative position to start with and a promising career path within the company. The significance of the second giraffe above the doorway now becomes evident based upon the conversation that Terry and Angela have regarding Terry's job offer for Angela. Having witnessed the sad and pained look on Donald's face as he left Angela and Terry alone to talk in private, it is clear that Donald did not belong at the table with Angela and Terry. The giraffe above the doorway was never referring to Donald- it was always referring to Angela. The appearance of the second giraffe coincided with Terry Colby's visit to offer Angela a job. Giraffes will appear again if we fast forward to S02E04, when we have the opportunity to revisit the arcade again after it has been discovered by the FBI. The camera follows Dom and two of her FBI colleagues as they make their way into the arcade via the side alley entrance. Dom comments that Romero had a comprehensive list of all FBI field agents at his house, but had printed out hard copies of a few select pages of the FBI field agent list. All three FBI agent's names were on the printed pages and that the only other similarity that they all shared was that they all had interviewed Gideon Goddard. As soon as the three FBI agents enter the arcade, a wide angle shot captures the multiple detectives processing the arcade for evidence and in the far right corner we can see three stuffed giraffes standing upright on top of the ThunderBall cases. There are no other stuffed animals visible- just the three stuffed giraffes. Although there are multiple FBI agents processing the scene, Dom and her two male colleagues are the only ones not wearing blue FBI field jackets. This is done intentionally to emphasize that Dom and her two colleagues are special. They are not your typical, run of the mill field agents. They are unique and worthy of special attention- just like the three toy giraffes standing upright by themselves on top of the ThunderBall cases. I think the connection between Dom and her two colleagues and the three toy giraffes is pretty clear. Given that we have seen giraffes used to first represent a member of F Society, then high born aristocratic members both within society and E Corp, as well as FBI agents at the arcade, I don't think that it is too much of a stretch to place Romero somewhere in between the two. Considering that Phillip Price indicated to White Rose/ Jung that they were aware of who was behind the 5/9 hack at the end of Season 1, it makes sense that there was a mole within F Society. Last but not least is Romero's name. In the NATO phonetic alphabet, the letter R is distinguished with the word "Romeo". His first name, Leslie, mean's "Holly-Garden" and the Holly family of plants have numerous references to pagan, gaelic and christian symbolic attributes. As a result, Romero's first name (Leslie) has religious and spiritual meanings and his last name, Romero, bears a close resemblance to the NATO / Military phonetic alphabet. Sorry for the size of this... just wanted to back up theories here. Feel free to PM if you have any specific questions.

  • Emanuel Smitham Reply

    We do not know the source of consciousness and science has determined that consciousness not only exists in human beings but in animals and plants as well. A stone is not merely a stone. It can also act as a symbol. The earliest symbol of a stone in a religious context is as I have already explained, a material object which exists in a universe governed by immaterial forces. Our planet can be viewed as just a large stone in space, but there is clearly much more to it isn't there? You said that none of the reality I expressed exist beyond the "human conciseness" and you are incorrect. Have you ever watched the BBC Earth documentaries? Specifically, the episodes which deal with the Birds of Paradise? Certain birds will collect colorful stones/pebbles and arrange them in a specific way to attract mates. Even animals impart some abstract significance to something as simple as a stone. They place value on it in an attempt to reach a goal. This shows us that animals have consciousness and are capable of abstract thinking in much the same way we are. Watch those documentaries and you will see that what you view as "artificial" human ideas are also expressed by animals. So where do you draw the line between natural and artificial with pure objectivity? You simply cannot. To that bird, those stones exist as something meaningful/valuable without the use of human imagination, so you are incorrect. "There is no innate spirit beyond that which the human mind creates." I don't understand why you could make such a definitive sweeping statement and offer it as truth without any logical proof or data beyond your own opinion when the sharpest minds in our species cannot conclusively answer this question. Human beings are still trying to figure out what life is, what consciousness is, what the building blocks of existence are, and yet, you feel you can safely say that there is no life force or "spirit" that exists beyond the human being? Many philosophers have determined that mathematics represent a sort of "divine language" because the laws of mathematics exist without the need for human beings to discover them. There are also the innumerable species that exist on this planet besides us. Therefore, there is clearly order in the universe and plenty of life which exists beyond the human observation which for some reason you think is artificial. Why do you feel like you don't belong on this planet? Why do you feel that anything human is artificial when you evolved here, not elsewhere. Think about that. There is clearly some intelligence at work when animal species show us that they can problem solve to reach a goal, or use a stone as a symbol in a way we would. You cannot put consciousness into a box and label it as human. It is short sighted and a poorly conceived hypothesis that you can easily deconstruct. Finally, you keep applying modern day views of religion and assuming the origins of religion reflect the same views which is 100% incorrect. The origins of religion are rooted in gratitude. As man evolved and began questioning his origin, quite naturally as any thinking being would, he sought a way to commune with the universe or the forces which allowed for him/her to exist to find answers to "why, how, where, etc.". Why doers this threaten you? How can you say this is artificial? These questions came from us naturally, they were not implanted by some robot with an "artificial" motive, so how can they possibly be anything but natural? The concept of a maker or some intelligence force in the universe was inevitable because we are thinking beings that ask why. Don't you ever ask why or how? Don't you ever think about your existence? Don't you ever wonder where the universe came from? Do you really think all those thoughts are purely artificial? Don't you ever feel grateful for the loved ones in your life? Do you ever feel gratitude for anything good in your life? I'm sure you do, and that feeling of gratitude is what the origins of religions embody. It is not saying thanks to a "god" or "supreme being", it is gratitude for the simple fact that you can enjoy wonderful things on a stable plane (stone) that provides the fuel for life. When religion was institutionalized, and shaped in the image of man (Greek mythology), that is when we started to use the tool of religion in the way that you are opposed to and call artificial, even though it is perfectly natural as a form of exploration. You cannot take what you don't like about religion and apply it to its origins or to its entirety. That would be like judging a book by its cover. Religion is simply a tool and the way you use it determines the fruit of it. A simple analogy is a butter knife. I can use it to butter your toast or to gouge your eyes out, it does not make the butter knife good or bad or artificial, it simply remains as a tool. Because we have institutionalized and made religion into a force of control, we have lost touch with its inherent, natural, and pure origins, but it does not make religion artificial or useless. It is very useful and very good if used properly. You shouldn't write it off just because you feel discouraged by human beings today and how they choose to use these tools.

  • Cicero Walker Reply

    There is no denying any of what you say Eric. I think Innova make some truly great discs. I even started bagging a T-Bird recently, the first Innova thing in my bag for 3+ years! I also am testing out an FD. So yeah - they make some great discs. And you can't criticise a mold - because if you don't like a disc - well, you just don't like it, and that doesn't make it bad. I would never use a Groove - but I won't deny people love them. Crazy people - but nevertheless. ;) My problem with Innova, is their quality. Or rather, lack thereof. Each time we get 500 discs arrive from Innova, my heart sinks, because I know how much sanding I am going to have to do. I estimate I'm going to have to spend on average, 60-90 seconds sanding over 70% of the discs. So - make it a minimum of 6 hours inspecting, sanding, and checking the bottom rims. If we get a similar shipment from Latitude64/Trilogy then that time will be zero minutes and zero seconds for ALL the bevelled drivers! Yes, I may have to spend 60 seconds sanding and checking around 20% of the mids, due to flashing, but the difference is night and day. The same shipment from MVP will have almost zero time, because of the way MVP/Axiom locate their flashing. But we don't pay any less for Innova discs, and so it costs a lot more to sell Innova than other discs. This is a string disincentive! Look, often the discs I get from Innova are so badly flashed, that if you attempted to sidearm some of the drivers, you would tear the skin on the side of your grip, it's so bad. The stuff is clearly visible even before you pick the disc up. Latitude64 understand that flashing is an issue, and their response is to move the flashing point to the bottom of the leading edge, and the outer surface of the bottom rim. Once a disc comes out of the mold, it gets the sprue chopped off, and gets fed into a finishing machine. This grinds the bottom of the leading edge, of all bevelled discs - and it's all done by a robot. This creates the perfect leading edge. And if you know your aerodynamics, then you know that the leading edge IS the wing, and the last 90% of the wing doesn't do anything to accelerate the air above it. My assessment of Innova discs as being of consistently lower quality than both these other makers is based on many years of experience, and many years of selling thousands of discs. I do not have anything against Innova as a company, or the people who run it, or the people who throw Innova discs, or the sponsored players. *I just have a problem with their lazy manufacturing and QA process*. There is nothing wrong with the discs they make, *once they have been sanded so they will no longer injure the thrower*. And the majority of the discs Innova ship require such treatment. If Innova wish to continue as the 800lb gorilla in the disc golf industry, then they are going to have to change their strategy at some point. Currently they are by far the largest manufacturer, and their sales are growing, but they are losing market share hand over fist, that that is ALWAYS a sign of long term disaster. Unless Innova actually INNOVAte, and do *something* to raise the quality of their discs, and progress the technology, then their market share will continue to decline, until Latitude64 knock them off the top spot. I really hope Innova are able to rise to the challenge, but I suspect they will not. I've seen no evidence of them trying anything new or interesting in many years. Oh - I suppose they did completely validate MVP's entire business model, by releasing two overmolded discs, but even then they couldn't figure out how to hide the injection points - which is pretty laughable.

  • Jefferey Botsford Reply

    Brad Bird. He knows how to create movies with depth and humanity, making the audience connect with a robot (The Iron Giant), a rat (Ratatouille) and he's made arguably the best superhero movie of all time, The Incredibles. I think Superman is in dire need of a director who can make the audience connect with the character. Sure, plenty of you feel that way already but bare in mind you're already attached to these characters as fans. For the general audience Superman's death barely had the impact it should have it seems, and it was lacking in straight up moments of human happiness. It had a fair few moments of the hero finding help from his loved ones, but sometimes you just need one or two scenes where we just see the character enjoying himself and not being such a doom and gloom plank of wood. I just think he's the man who has to direct a Superman sequel. It'd be fitting as well considering a large part of The Iron Giant is Superman.

  • Deon Altenwerth Reply

    I have a science question, and a recruitment question: **Science question** If we train a network to distinguish several species of animals, it may learn that "if the background is entirely blue, then there is a high probability that the animal is a bird" (because cows are rarely up in the sky). But that sort of knowledge is implicit in the layers of the network. Do you work/plan to work on: * Extracting explicit knowledge from neural network training? * Or using explicit knowledge (such as "the animals able to fly are birds", "pigeons are birds", "the sky is bly",...) to guide the training of a neural network? I have thought a lot about such an approach recently because: * Knowledge on the world learned in one task can often be useful in another task. While the lateral connections of a progressive neural network can help transfering some of the knowledge, it seems unwieldy when the number of tasks becomes very high, and it seems that only a fraction of the knowledge can be transferred that way. * Once aquired, knowledge can be manipulated with deductive, inductive and abductive reasoning. Interesting methods have emerged from the Knowledge Representation & Reasoning field, expliciting the knowledge aquired during the training would give us access to those methods. * If a situation happens rarely in the data distribution (e.g. a special event in a game, water flooding for a cleaner robot,...) a deep net might learn the correct behaviour, and then forget it. Learning explicit knowledge would allow us to keep this knowledge in memory so as to not forget it (unless we find an event contradicting our piece of knowledge). In humans, catastrophic interference is avoided thanks to the interaction between hippocampus and neocortex (according to " Active long term memory networks", I am no biologist). I think explicit knowledge could fulfill this function for artificial agents. **Recruitment question** How do you evaluate the scientific ability of a candidate to join your team? For instance: I have a PhD in theoretical science (logics, but nothing to do with AI) and I have been working in the R&D department of a startup for a year (90% of deep-learning, but nothing original). So my resume does not seem enough to get me in Google Brain. To prove that I have what it takes, I'm working on my free time. But, because this resource is limited, should I spend it: * Reading a lot of machine learning books and articles to get a good general knowledge of the field. * Trying some original research to prove that I have original ideas (but given my limited time, the chance of success is low). * Working more hours on my company, to prove that I can make something succeed (even if it means coding datasets crawlers, annotation tools, optimizing performance, creating specialized ontologies,...). That may be good for my programming skills, but I doubt it will be enough to convince you I can do great research in AI. While I contextualized the second question into my situation, I think the "I work in a AI related job, how can I do the most out of my spare time to get in Google Brain" is a question which will interest other people.

  • Joelle Kassulke Reply

    Speaking as a non-engineer, The weight of the device itself would crush and deform anything it hit, and deform and bend itself, like watching a crane crash into a building. Gundams and other large robots have huge weight-power ratio problems for just moving, let alone handling the stresses of walking or throwing a punch. Even the Gasaraki mechs are improbable, even at 4-5m tall. A vibrating knife would need a material that is unbelievably hard, light, and resistant to shattering, bending, and can hold an edge of some kind - something that doesn't really exist - let alone be light enough to not vibrate apart or break the vibrating mechanism completely when it actually kinda pushes on anything - then the mech that would actually put enough energy to vibrate it on one axis without jamming with force applied - then the energy vs weight issue - same as the giant beast itself - the energy needed to run a mechanism to continually vibrate a 25 ft long 3 ton ceramic/carbon fiber blade for longer than a few milliseconds is insane. Maybe having something like a rail gun, where it charges up and discharges it all at once for 1-2 seconds right when it is needed would be a solution - vibrate really fast for 1 second right when it is in contact and then it is spent for a recharge cycle. This is a much larger issue than power - there is literally no structure that could be strong enough to do the motions, let alone take a "punch" *and be light enough to be movable by even the strongest motors or whatever, even with an unlimited external power source. **Otherwise an Abrams tank would fly, and an f22 raptor could take a tank round and keep flying, so this is outside the bounds of engineering - because engineering is using materials within their bounds to solve a problem - remove those bounds, then it is just Sci Fi - which you already have.** Scaling up the size of objects and keeping the same motions is impossible - otherwise birds would all be hummingbirds - they can't scale up because muscles can't scale in power and bones would shatter and large feathers would rip off because their mass excerts such force it overcomes their attachment to a crow-sized bird - and he would need to drink a Liter of sugar water a day just to do this for 20 minutes. Asking how to design a crow-sized hummingbird is impossible - we would use rotors to make a crow sized drone. Making a giant robot cutter would shift to something like a long shaped charge rope or a large energy weapon (like a railgun or an ICBM) to defeat a large tall monolithic thing (that can barely move), not scale up a handheld weapon proportioned for a person brushing their teeth.

  • Marge Pouros Reply

    This is a great outfit, not 100% sure where you can find that exact but it looks like you could get separates to construct it. Example: 1. Wet look stockings available from or 2. Pvc romper available from sites like or you may need to just search wet look & options will come up. 3. Rubber girl brand elbow length latex gloves and attach with Late X brand suspenders straps to get the look from Just a suggestion, I've got big boobs & a tiny butt so I have to construct from separates quite a bit. Good luck

  • Foster Bins Reply

    (continued) Anvi lands on a metallic catwalk on her side, the hard metal providing a solid *CRUNK* in protest. She was...alive. In alot of pain in many, many ways but alive. She slowly pulls her hands underneath herself, not caring about the state of them at the moment. Where was the boy? Anvi looks around the dimly lit catwalk and turns around to look behind her, only to immediately wish she hadn't. The boy landed on a spike of metal, impaling him through the chest. Said spike was made of concrete and likely came from a barrier that had been damaged in the fall. Either way, he was quite dead, his body splayed out limply on the sharp shrapnel. Anvi turns her eyes from him, biting back her tears as she stands. Where did this catwalk go? Looking onward, she spotted the final destination. There sat a mech she had not seen before. Every now and again Egypt's Military would fly over or patrol nearby the area, and the Anubis units were quite famous. They were a little clunky but basically effective form of mechanized combat. But this one was sleek. It had plenty of armor stocked onto it's frame, but it looked far faster than it's older brothers. It's head greatly resembled the jackal god it was named for, and the catwalk lead straight to it. A hidden prototype? Anvi pulled herself along through a conscious stream of movement, shuffling half dead towards the mech. The metal path stretched on for an eternity. Her legs felt weak and stiff. Maybe she'd taken more damage in that fall than she thought. By the time she made it to the Anubis, blood trickled from her hands and stained her pants. There was a small console at the end of the catwalk that contained a few buttons, one of them being marked 'Open'. She pressed it and a panel on the side of it's head slid open. It dropped a ramp for Anvi with a slow whirring of noise. The cockpit was dark. Anvi pulled herself into the Anubis and into it's relatively small but cozy pilot space. Looking to the left, she found a first aid kit. Reaching for it, the teenage girl grabbed it and pulled it to herself, flipping it open and finding the gauze and the disinfectant. While applying them both, elbow accidentally hit the power switch, powering the unit on. An avatar of a regal looking bird appears on the screen above her. -"Anubis Mk4 Online. Test Pilot, please identify yourself."- Anvi blinked innocently at the elbow that hit the switch and then looks back towards the screen dumbfounded. "...Ah...hi?" -"Test pilot, please identify yourself."- Ra stated plainly. "Anvi Bassili." Anvi postured, using the last of the disinfectant on her hands. They were in bad shape, the burn having charred the area quite heavily. Some bits of skin weren't even there anymore. -"Processing...processing..."- Ra replied, a small filling progress bar briefly flashing on the screen. -"No test pilot authorization recorded. If you are not authorized to be here, then I will ask you to leave."- Anvi wraps some gauze around her hands, wincing as she pulled it tight. She looks up towards Ra's screen, her frustration written all over her face in bold. "Listen you peice of shit robot, don't you get it? There are no more test pilots! There is no more Egyptian military! Whomever the hell made you left you here to rot, because if you were worth half a damn, they'd have came for you. This is an emergency. Not just Egypt, but the entire world is under attack! And they just killed my friends. All of them. Every single fucking last one of them." Anvi draws herself quiet as she sits properly in the seat, her hands grabbing the control sticks. She speaks again with increased resolve. "So if you kick me out of here now, the aliens **WILL** find you. And they will either destroy you, or turn you against us. If you help me..." Anvi's voice wavers as tears stream down her face. "..I will do what I can to make sure that will not happen. I will take good care of you. I will not stop until they...**PAY** for what they have done." Ra's cartoon avatar gives a quizzical expression towards Anvi, as if sizing up the situation. An ellipsis appears on screen as the AI thinks. Finally, he speaks. -"This machine takes specialized training to-"- Anvi interrupts him immediately. "I don't care." -"I am incomplete, I am missing several key files-"- Anvi cuts him off again. "I don't care." -"Miss Anvi, you are quite injured judging by your vitals, the stress of battle may-"- Anvi growls. "I don't care." Ra interjects as quietly as he can. -"...I only have one weapon online at the moment. That may not be enough to-"- **"I DON'T FUCKING CARE!"** Anvi roars, her body vibrating with rage. "I will MAKE a way. I will FIGHT them. And we are going. Together." Ra's avatar sighs and shrugs. -"My programming indicates that if I am not to be captured by the enemy, I will need to make an exception. Very well Miss Anvi. Please proceed."- The rest of that night is a literal blur. The only thing Anubis had was it's wrist blades, the Umbra Scales. The missiles and other armaments were missing or otherwise unusable. Anvi's rage poured into fighting as she charged straight for the enemy troops that had crushed and burned her home. Her blades ripped through metal and machinery with ease, the teenager fighting like she never had before. Despite her revenge against the aliens that night would be successful, reducing a dozen into a pile of smoldering scrap, she was not happy. Her friends were still gone. She still had no home. But at least she still had Anubis. The last battle had taxed Anvi. It would be one thing if she was taken out in battle, either due to the strength of her enemy or her underestimation of it, but at least she still had options. She could still fight. The capture nets were something else entirely. For the first time, Ra was not there. The Anubis was not responsive. She could have been captured. The mere thought of giving the Aliens a face and a name burned within her. What if they damaged the Anubis? What if they extracted Ra? They had plasma cutters. They could reach in and take off it's arms and it's legs...peel apart the chest. Take off the head and maybe repurpose it into something- Anvi woke up in a cold sweat, her mind in a rush. She holds her head in her hands, calming her rapid breathing. She looked around the quiet barracks and then out towards the window. Egypt. Her home. Her former home. She shakes her head free of the memories that plagued her that night and looks down at her hands. Even though this was only a few months ago, her hands still hurt. They always hurt. It was a reminder of that night and how even at her most calm, she could never let the pain slide away so easily, at least for now. The Anubis was her tool. Her weapon. Her friend. There was no way she'd let them have it. Not without taking her out first. They wouldn't strip it's armor, because she'd add more. She'd bolt it in so hard and make it so difficult that they wouldn't even try. Anubis needed to be more than a mech. It needed to be invincible. Or at least as close as she could make it. Throwing on an A-shirt, some boots and her military slacks, Anvi marches out into misty early morning and trudges over towards the hangar where Anubis was held along with the others. Grabbing a blowtorch and many sections of metal, she takes a repair mech and makes her way to the Anubis, beginning to weld on more sections of armor, working in quiet determination. Ra speaks to an earpeice she'd put on as soon as she left her barracks. -"Good morning Miss Anvi. It is early. Are you sure you shouldn't be in bed?"- Anvi takes a moment to respond, shaking her head slowly while wiping away a tear. "I've got more work to do. I've got to make sure that you are ready for the next fight." ((There's your RP prompt to go talk to Anvi if you want. XD))

  • Susana Gleason Reply

    "I don't get it why you Organics do this," Sam said. He had picked a wild assortment of bodies for this mission: a snake, an octopedal thing with guns, and this walking net thing he used on most planets. "Because it's exciting, rubber brain," I said. Despite his age and intelligence I was convinced Sam didn't really understand us. "Yeah. And incredibly dangerous," Elle said. She fired her attitude thrusters to align us with what the Collective had identified as the main hatch of the alien ship. "It's exciting because it's dangerous. I might even die out here," I corrected. "You backuped?" I thought I heard real concern from Elle. "Of course. I'm not stupid," I said. "So, you're not really dying if this body is destroyed?" Sam asked. "Of course, I'll die if I die. I remember nothing from the moment of the backup. All I learned, all I experienced, is gone." "Radio discipline, people," the Collective reminded. "We're recording everything of this historic moment." "Yeah, historic my ass," Sam said. "This is the seventh species we discovered. If they are as exciting as the other six, I'll fall asleep." "I see lots of activity in the ship," Elle said. "There's heat and light and communication." "But no biological life, still?" The Collective could see through the sensors in Elle's body, so that question was redundant. I assumed they asked it to calm my nerves. "Nope. Dead as a dodo." A few minutes later, Elle landed on the air lock. Sam's Octo walked to a control panel, holding onto the ship with its magnetic feet. A segmented digit extended from his belly, probed around, and finally flipped open a lid on the panel. A whole bunch of metal tentacles came forward and began typing on the console. A few seconds later, the air lock opened. Elle ejected Sam's other bodies from the skiff, then me, then her own body. The small space ship would way for us out here. The Octo walked around and then through the hatch. I activated my magnetic boots. They pulled me gently down to the floor. "You're standing on a freaking wall," Sam said. "The floor is marked with these triangle things." "Stupid jelly bag," he added a bit quieter. "How about you transmit that data to my suit, rubber brain?" "Language, people", the Collective reminded. Racist slurs on such a historic moment were intolerable. "Cycling lock," Sam said. The Octo positioned itself in front of the inner hatch. "Move your squishy parts to the wall." I moved over. Sam's net body carried the snake body and pushed it into a wall. Elle was in front of me and pointed a heavy welding laser towards the hatch. Normally, she used that limb for heavy repairs in space. It could probably be used to unrepair things too. "On three. One, two, three," Sam said and the hatch irised open. We looked at a few hundred robot squids. They looked at us, seemingly puzzled. After an eternity, two seconds or so, they turned as one and painted the Octo with targeting lasers. "We come in peace. Take us to your leaders," Sam said. The squids began to swarm towards Sam, snapping their claws at him. With a sigh, Sam opened fire. The heavy projectiles hit the robot squids and ripped them apart. After twenty seconds, it was over. We entered the ship proper. The Octo secured to the front and to the sides, snake and net disappeared in air vents. Elle scanned the remains of the robots. "They're a swarm. The ship's computer is the queen, probably," she said after a moment. "Nothing unusual there." "Found the crew," Sam said. "All dead. Killed by decompression mostly. A few have been clawed by squids." "Copy that," Elle said. "We're moving into the computer bay." The Octo lead the way, guided by the slowly completing scans from Sam's bodies and Elle's sensors. I walked after them, fully aware of my vulnerability. Elle's augmentations would allow her to wrestle down a squid. If that failed, she could always eject her brain module and fly it back to the skiff. Knowing her, she would return with a more sturdy body and a dozen of Sam's. "Pete, the Computer. Alien computer, this is Pete," Elle introduced us as we stood in a small hot room with blinking wall panels. "Scan complete," a new voice said in my helmet. It sounded mechanical. "Organic life form, designation Pete. You will be exterminated for your own good." "Cyborg life form, designation Elle," it added. "You will be exterminated in self defense." "Artificial life form, designation Sam. You will be assimilated to improve our technology." Sam's Octo cut off all the tentacles that tried to make the threats reality. Meanwhile Sarah searched for the off-switch. "Hi computer, why do you want to kill organic life forms," I asked. "Exterminating organic life forms is a consequence of our mission." "What mission?" "Our mission is to serve the People," the computer said. The display in my helmet displayed images of a biologic version of the squid to indicate the species that called itself People. Like almost everybody else. And like almost everybody else, they had designed their intelligent robots in their image. "Our mission is to protect the People from harm. They cannot be harmed when they can't die. They can't die when they are dead." I sighed. Another species dead due to its own stupidity. See Darwin, Charles, Selection of the fittest. "Found the memory of that thing," Elle said. She folded parts out of her right forearm until only three steel rods remained. She placed the parts near a wall panel with blinking lights. The parts reconfigured themselves to connect to various plugs between the lights. "Download complete," she announced a few seconds after she had plugged in. "I got their complete history. Looks like the usual thing: robot slaves, AI uprising, all dead." "Shit," Sam said. "It's all the same with these Organics. Too lazy to work, too stupid to make them work." "Wise words, my friend," I said. The corpses around us were testament to it. "Let's get this piece of scrap out of the way", Elle said. "You will all be exterminated in self defense," croaked the alien computer. The rest was the usual post-mission cleanup. Sam disabled the power supply, a simple fusion reactor. Even if the computer wanted to kill us by exploding the ship, it couldn't. Elle deactivated the computer. I searched the dead crew for identifying features. We returned to the skiff. Elle fired the main drive and brought us back to the Collective. Our home in space, the size of a moon, waited far away from the danger that the alien ship posed. We had to remove it from the shipping lanes. The Collective fired a ball of nanites into the ship. In minutes, the greedy little bugs ate the thing while reproducing like bunnies. Another skiff returned the nanites. The material of the ship would be integrated into the Collective where it was needed most. A few nanites would become a table, some would be a door or part of a lamp. *Two days later* "You know," Sam said from his perch on a tree above me and Elle, "these missions are depressing. All these people dead, all these AIs made into killers. And why? Because the Organics wanted slaves instead of peers." Elle, wearing an almost human-looking body today, turned to us. The dull gold color of her skin reflected the warm glow of the simulated sunlight. She looked at Sam's bird body, then at me. "Can we talk about something else? We're at home, not at work." "OK," Sam and I said almost simultaneously. The silence wasn't as uncomfortable as it used to be. After fifty years of marriage, the three of us could simply sit on the beach of our house and enjoy being around each other.

  • Elliot Hoeger Reply

    Don't forget the elbow length rubber gloves!

  • Florian Schultz Reply

    Watched the video (Sorry, stuff happened and couldn't respond). > It was said straight up Shadow Tag were basically anti aircraft rounds, if their their the same as anti aircraft rounds I'd say they'd be around the same speed. I read 3 chapters of the manga, and from it didn't show that so I can only see what DB said. They're saying that it's similar to Anti Aircraft rounds because it has lock on, which is illogical. But let's say that's true. Raiden is at least as quick as Old Snake (Who was having seizures at the time btw), who dodged a ultra sonic rail gun slug. Ultra sonic isn't even on the list for sonic speeds so there are multiple ways we can interpret it. List is this btw. Subsonic -> Transonic -> Supersonic -> Hypersonic -> High Hypersonic -> Reentry speeds It could be ultra sound speeds (For whatever reason) which is 1,540 m/s. An IIRC weaker version is compared to the force of a tank shell, so it could be over 1,700 m/s (Doubtful, it's likely faster as the slug is smaller IIRC). Or it could mean that it's a new regime for sonic speeds over re-entry speeds, which would means speeds over Mach 25, or 8,575 m/s. Pick your poison, even the slowest is faster than a dubious claim from DB, unless you have a scan of them saying it's Anti Aircraft levels, in that case yeah it's still slower. > Him dodging lightning is actually done in game by dodging a blast from Meio who is the God and Creator of Earth. Is it a QTE? That'd make it canon, instead of game mechanics. If it isn't scripted, it's not canon. > If you don't believe me look it up for yourself, we've made plasma hotter than the surface of the sun. Falchion is basically a lightsaber, it even looks similar to one. Doubtful we made it last for over a second or we'd have killed a lot of people, and would've been on the news and noted as a huge tragedy, causing people to hate science, etc. Everything within miles of Strider would have spontaneously combust when he activated it. Just because they're made of the same things doesn't mean anything, there are tons of plasma weapons in fiction no where near that heat. > The HF blade would be damaged just by being hit by it. From what I read in the manga, the best he did was cutting up walls and rocks, which is at most comparable to what Raiden does. > I'm not saying Strider is stronger than Raiden I'm just saying he's not as weak as you think he is. Actually expected him to be stronger tbh. Thought he was a different ninja that parried blows from skyscraper sized monsters. > While he hasn't fought anybody who has the durability, strength and speed of Raiden besides maybe Meio, he has fought people that use the same fighting styles and tactics as Raiden does. He's fought people who constantly switch between using their hands to attack and the thumb in their feet? And knowing a fighting style wouldn't do much, if I was thousands of times stronger. > It was said the station was the size of the moon. Again it wasn't stated what the size of the explosion was, all we have that shows maybe the size of the explosion is a picture of the explosion coming out both sides of it and what appears to be the top side of the station falling off. I also looked up some more information on Strider and apparently in his second fight with Meio they accidentally destroyed the moon and Strider also came down falling from orbit like he did the last time. Do you have a citation for these claims? DB didn't say Strider sliced a space station in half IIRC, you'd think that'd be pretty useful information, and it's not like they forgot about it because they even said he destroyed it, just not how he did it. > Besides that Strider also has a lot more gear than Raiden. He has a robot bird that drops miniature bombs on people. He has robot tigers that he can sick on to attack his foes. He also has two robot balls that rotate around him that shoot a constant supply of lasers. There's also his gear tricks which can boost his speed, strength and agility, they can do things like shooting fire at people. Most of that's pretty unquantifiable from what I remember, what's the firepower, speed, how much does it boost his stats, how powerful are the lasers, if don't know anything about it we can't say whether or no it'd even help.

  • Bianka Leuschke Reply

    >Luke was in a room full of trained fighter pilots saying the exhaust port was too small and his response was "PSSSSSHHH I used to bullseye womp rats all the time, you pussies". Maybe I'm missing a key part of Star Wars lore here. But I'm pretty sure the pilots the rebels were able to pull together were sort of a last ditch effort, and tons of other skilled pilots had died during the conflict before, and on Dantoonie ofc. I always got the impression that the pilots weren't very experienced. So luke is in a room of "equals" when he says, that, not superiors. And the pilot could have just been wrong, or a bad shot. If anyone has more experience with the extended universe stuff, let me know. >Anakin built an artificially intelligent, self-aware robot out of scrap parts when he was, what, 7? >Rey fixed the Millennium Falcon. WOW. Is this really worth sending death threats and hate mail over? I hate C3PO's origin story. But these comparisons are really the same. Anakin builds 3PO over some unknown period of time, and he's a junker kid. It's all he knows how to do. It's a passive backstory trait. Rey fixing the mellinium falcon is a very active trait in the story. She does it, and the plot moves along. Like she is an RPG with repairing skills in a video game. She uses her "ability" when it would make active sense to. Even though she has no history with the falcon. Here's the other thing too: it's the millennium falcon. The ship IS Han Solo. We've only seen 2 people fly it before then: Han and Lando, who is the original owner so it kinda makes sense that he would be able to fly it. Han Solo is defined as a character for the ship. To have Rey just immediately be able to fly the falcon makes it and Han less special. To have her do a good job immediately kinda breaks a little bit of the world building. Like, they could have a scene where Rey plays a video game in her cave which simulates flying. That would be enough backstory for why she's able to pilot a ship immediately. We're sort of implied that she wants to be a rebel pilot like Luke, but that has no bearing on the falcon necessarily. Luke never flew the falcon, which I always assumed to mean that the big bird itself was kind of an exotic beast to pilot. Anyways, apples and oranges IMO. It's not just misogyny.

  • Ada Funk Reply

    The owner of a printed circuit board manufacturer was back in the plating department and got a solution on his hand due to not wearing rubber elbow length gloves (it can happen easily by accident) where he screwed up was he put his arm, to the elbow, into another bath which he thought was water to rinse his arm off, but it was actually an Acid Bath (luckily it was mostly H2O with the acid being at 10% strength so after a minute or two, his arm started itching like crazy and he was going nuts trying to figure out why until we noticed and told him to put it in a very specific bath that was 100% pure water to further dilute the Acid, and then to go wash it with soap and water to kill any further acid reaction on his arm, which luckily was caught early enough to prevent any damage or major harm to be caused. You would figure with him being the owner/boss he would KNOW what everything was and how it generally worked.

  • Alycia Connelly Reply

    YES! DON'T DO ANYTHING TO DO WITH LYE WITHOUT EYE PROTECTION. PERMANENT BLINDNESS WILL RESULT IF YOU SO MUCH AS FLICK A DROP ACCIDENTALLY WHILE STIRRING...Call 911 it's over you've lost that eye this shit dissolves it right out of the socket so don't fuck around. I wear goggles and long sleeves and rubber elbow length gloves while in the work, and not just the mixing.... once you start the basifying process at least wrapping shades and an old shirt could save your ass. Be safe and good luck you have the right tek brother. Don't be overly scared but do everything with lye slowly and carefully. PHL

  • Chaim Bode Reply

    This. You don't need some fancy solution to clean your bag with, that's a complete ripoff. The lotion is meant for helping with someone who *has* poison ivy...not cleaning it off your stuff. Just wear gloves (I recommend elbow length heavy rubber ones) and hot water with soap, can either be detergent or dawn dish soap.

  • Devan Fisher Reply

    To find the place where you got that "500%" figure requires a pair of elbow length rubber gloves.

  • Gunnar Williamson Reply

    #[THE UNNATURAL BORN KILLERS]( *** [**Alucard**]( [The Brutal Bloodsucker]( Read Alucard backwards and what do you get? Dracula! That’s right bitches, Alucard is the legendary centuries-old vampire himself. A brutal, ruthless killer but with a sense of justice and protects the innocent. Once an all-powerful vampire ruler, he now works for the Hellsing organization, hunting down other vampires and monsters. He is incredibly powerful; so powerful in fact that he has to create internal restrictions to limit his power. For Scramblemania he will be restricted to Level 1, which means he has superhuman speed and strength, incredible uncanny aim, the ability to summon familiars from his body, and the power to regenerate from injuries thanks to the reservoir of souls he has absoRainbow Dashed. [**Psylocke**]( [The Seductive Psychic Swordsman]( Psylocke has one of the most confusing and convoluted origins in the Marvel universe (and that’s saying something). Born in Britain, she developed psychic powers in her youth, and joined the X-men on their merry journeys. It was during one of these were she was left amnesiac and taken in by the Hand ninja clan, who trained her as a ninja. She ended up switching bodies with a Japanese woman, regaining her memories, and rejoining the X-men. She is typically on the X-force, a team that is more willing to get its hands dirty and kill to get what they need, which should tell you much about her. She is able to use telekinesis to send people/things flying, or manifest them as weapons like katanas, daggers, and arrows. She also has telepathy, which has been limited for Scramblemania to just reading and transmitting thoughts within her own team. [**Soundwave**]( [The Decepticon Destroyer]( Soundwave is one of the Decepticons, part of a race of transforming robot beings known as, you guessed it, Transformers. As a former gladiator on their homeworld, Soundwave is a truly ruthless and fierce fighter who leaves nothing to chance. He is also fiercely loyal, especially to Megatron, leader of the Decepticons. Despite his ferocity, Soundwave acts primarily as a spy for the Decepticons, transforming into an aerial drone and eavesdropping on anyone. He doesn’t say much, or anything, in fact; instead he records others and plays them back in his own message. In battle he can send out LaseRainbow Dasheak, a robot bird that can shoot lasers. For Scramblemania he is also blessed with a small amount of red energon each round, enough to boost his speed to the point where everything else appears frozen in time for 30 seconds. [**Light Yagami**]( [Judge Jury and Executioner]( Light Yagami is the definition of a sociopathic genius. Once just an ordinary highschool student, he stumbled upon a notebook called the Death Note. As it turned out, by writing someone’s name in the book and thinking of that person’s face, the person would die. The book was dropped by Ryuk, a Shinigami, or death spirit, who was bored and wanted to see what would happen on Earth if he did that. Light decided to take it upon himself to rid the world of evil using that book, writing down the names of criminals and sentencing them to death. Light, of course, does not do this out of malice or evil. He truly believes he is ridding the world of evil, and envisions a world where he is worshipped as a god. Don’t worry though; he doesn’t have the Death Note for Scramblemania. Instead, he will be relying on his incredible wits. He has repeatedly led the FBI and all who wish to uncover his identity on a merry chase, even ending up leading the task force hunting himself down at one point. He will also have the help of Ryuk (if he feels like it), who is invisible to everyone else and can help Light by spying on others. *** Vs *** #TEAM ONE PIECE OUT *** [Ryuko Matoi](, The Seifuku Slasher Ryuko Matoi is a Japanese schoolgirl who wanders throughout the country searching for the one who killed her father. She is armed with a giant scissors blade sword thing, and wears a powerful sailor uniform called Senketsu that provides incredible durability despite having less cloth than a handkerchief. She is a fierce fighter and incredibly tenacious, and can cause huge damage with her giant scissors sword. [Yoshikage Kira](, He’s a Kira Queen, Gunpowder, Guillotine… Yoshikage Kira, from the JoJo Universe, is a self-absorbed narcissist with an [obsession with his hands]( He is narcissistic to the point that he is cold and emotionless to other human beings. Like most JoJo characters, his power is derived from his Stand, Killer Queen. Killer Queen is able to create explosive bubbles that explode upon contact. It is also able to create a powerful attack called Sheer Heart Attack, which sends forth a heat seeking automatic bomb that tracks down its enemies and blows them up, or simply drills right through them. [Free the Werewolf](, The Immortal Icy Fist Free is an immortal werewolf who has been alive for centuries and can heal from any damage done to him. He was locked up for centuries for stealing the left eye of a witch, and naturally this stolen eye grants him various magical powers such as shooting magic beams, creating impermeable barriers, creating holographic projections, and teleportation. As a werewolf he also is able to turn into werewolf mode, and can use Ice magic in a variety of useful and deadly ways. Overall he is extremely versatile, powerful, and most importantly *immortal*. ^^(how did he make it thru smh) [Spencer Reid](, The Drugged-up Detective Spencer Reid comes from the somewhat popular TV show, Criminal Minds. He works in Behavioural Analysis Unit of the FBI and uses his training in Psychology to profile criminals. He also uses his other 3 PhDs to do genius crime solving stuff. He displays some form of autism and has trouble interacting with humans (because all quirky geniuses must have some form of autism these days). Of course, as a normal human being he couldn’t possibly keep up, so he has access to NZT pills from another TV series, Limitless, which allow him to use the full prowess of his human brain, having perfect recall, instantaneous learning capability and uncanny analytical skills.

  • Glenda Lynch Reply

    **MIRKYJ JUDGING** ______ **Round 1** **Suckaduck** In the run up to the first bar, “it’s bout to be” feels off, but you catch it pretty quick, still a tough way to start though and it taints the opening bars for me. The hot blade/got game is nice for the internals, but too general, and there goes the first four bars. You did establish the “Robot-flow” character you are trying to paint of him, and proceed to deconstruct the straw man with your trademark venom. I Googled “Ichabod Flame”, pretty much on your suggestion hoping its a comic book reference, but all i saw was “did you mean Ichabod Crane?”. Agin, the quatrain/flame is great, and the internals tight, and you are painting a picture, but now bombs yet. When shift gears at “verbose” you catch the spirit. Staying with the theme, packing internals and hitting it on time, and then ending with the first laugh-out-loud punch (Ritalin has a sound). It is a great critique because saying that nerdcore is played out on the subreddit is not only a valid critique, it puts him in the catch-22 of either dumbing it down out his comfort zone to prove he can do it, or doubling down and leaning into the criticism. The last is a bit sloppy, but is forgiven by the final line which is just perfect. Slow start but still above average verse, even if it is below expectations. **HeadHaunter** Starting off butter, if a little low energy. The avian joke thing seemed like you were about to set up a bird joke, but then it is a puppy training metaphor and i loose you. First four felt like you were warming up. The next four hit harder, but don’t get to 100%. Is Sucka’s real name Mike? How is that muffling? Or is that a joke about his subpar vocal mixing. The melted ice/never bright is the first punch that hits, but still i don’t buy painting suckaduck as a slapstick artists. Maybe Franzon or something, but the dude is pretty restrained. Maybe that is you trying to flip his “nerd core” charicature of you, but it is muddled. That said, the 6 to 10/inside a pen line is devastating, and is then one upped with the dexter line. That might be the toughest 4 of the whole tournament right there. Again i think painting Sucka as a synthetic rapper isn’t the best angle, but i can’t not nod my head to flawless execution. You keep the napalm dropping for the final four and finish stronger. Here you begin to paint a more vivid picture of your opponent, either stuck in his living room being murdered, or over confident brushing his teeth battling sheep. It is enough to have you just barely take the round. Other than the beginning, my only other criticism is it gets a bit monotonous, and even though the flow is dope it would be next level with a more obvious flow switch. **Sucka** “Shoulda used bird jokes” I’m saying! Starting off targeted, flipping his contender line, and rubbing his nose in it. You probably also notice he doesn’t really switch the flow so you step up to double time to show the versatility and it works pretty well. You miss a beat on “weak poetry” and game cocks but the rest is on point. Using bird jokes on him like, “If he ain’t gonna i will.” When you slow it down, simplifying the rhythm to prove the point, i with you, but i wish new car was a more vivid/demeaning simile than “new car”. The critique isn/t 100% because he got internals, but he doesn’t switch the flow as easily as you and you are right to call him on it. Then to drive the point home, you hit the double time again on the last 4 and the abrupt shift with “nope that’s wrong” is a great example of not only you rhythmic timing (which you both got down) but your comedic timing, which you excel at. You spit is conversationally but still totally on rhythm, with little effort. Calling him a tag along felt a bit flat considering you usually slay on the final line, but still a tight verse, and more dynamic and consistent than the first. **Round 2** **HeadHaunter** Maybe it is the beat, maybe you just took his implicit criticism of your more monotone flow, but mad props for going for this evolving, start and stop flow. It is hard to pull off, and takes tight writing skills, and you get to 100% sometimes, but not 100% of the time. Sometimes it sounds like you are really riding the beat and hitting the end lines (sticks and stones, whack persona), but other times the flow is jarring (worthless, imagery). There are some hard hitting punches here too, working with your image of him as someone making bomb threats with no bomb. Really felt the “Why I oughta…” bit, and i started to understand why you are calling him a troglodyte; he does have a Ralph Kramden thing going, but Sucka’s verses are plenty smart, both in how they are written and delivered so the critique doesn’t always stick. I think I’m also bothered by it because he basically called you out for being a nerd core rapper with a thesaurus addiction, and instead of addressing it head on you just call him dumb and do yourself no favors to buck that image (i.e. troglodyte, Saitama, etc.) And the line between indignant and conceited is a more legit line to walk in a rap battle than the using those words to describe your opponent. Now i see you pushing yourself with the triplets and frequent flow switches, but you don’t nail it down hard enough and would have been better served staying in your comfort zone. Again, that might be more about the beat than an intentional decision but it still made it harder for me to follow. **Suckaduck Wins** Headhaunter did his damn thing on this battle. He came hard, upped his game, and delivered some of the most withering criticisms of the tourney with that dexter morgan imagery. I have no real problems with his flow or lyrics out of context, but weighing them against suckaduck, seems like sucka’s style is better suited for a battle, and he obviously has more experience. This shit was DAMN CLOSE though, and i won’t be surprised if some fellow judges (ahem) have more affinity for the nerd core flow than i do, even though i myself sleep with a thesaurus and use 5 dollar college words often enough to make the student loans worth it. Look forward to hearing more from Headhunter, in battles and otherwise, and if enough disagree, from him in the finals. For me though, duck did what he does best: create a coherent, laugh-out-loud funny but still grounded straw man of his opponent and proceed to deconstruct it until he wins. Best battle so far.

  • Ryley Blanda Reply

    I don't think there's any generally agreed-upon definition of 'sentience'. I've heard some people claim that it covers the ability of an agent (which may be an animal, or a robot, or whatever) to change the way it acts in some complex way based on sensory inputs from its environment. On the other end of the scale, I've heard some people use it to refer to actual awareness of the agent's own existence (that is, the agent must be able to think about itself as a distinct thing). There are probably several other lines inbetween that get drawn by different people. Personally, I use 'consciousness' to refer to true self-awareness, and 'sentience' to refer to the ability of an agent to *subjectively experience* sensations. To explain more clearly: When you look at something orange, you not only receive a stimulus to your nervous system from the orange light hitting your eye, you actually have a *mind* that *sees orange.* There is a subjective viewpoint (your own mind) to which the orangeness actually appears and has a certain look, related to but conceptually distinct from the actual properties of the orange object. To be sentient is to have this kind of viewpoint. (Note that, although you are fortunate enough to also be conscious, able to think about your own existence, it does not seem necessary that any sentient agent also be conscious. On the other hand, it *does* seem necessary that a conscious agent also be sentient, insofar as you couldn't possibly think about your own existence unless you had a subjective perception of your own thoughts.) Equivalently, this also means that a sentient agent is one that has a *worldview,* that is to say, it holds in its mind a theory about how the world is. Let me take a moment to describe a particular anecdote in zoology that illustrates what a lack of sentience means (and thus, what sentience means). There is a kind of wasp that reproduces by laying its eggs inside a paralyzed caterpillar, so that the babies can eat the fresh caterpillar meat after they hatch. (Gross, I know. Supposedly these same wasps were one of the reasons Charles Darwin abandoned religion, saying he found it inconceivable that a loving God would create such a horrifying creature.) But the wasp doesn't just leave the caterpillar lying around; rather, it digs a burrow in the dirt, then goes and finds a caterpillar, then drags the caterpillar back to the burrow and hides it inside before laying its eggs, to keep the eggs away from predators. When the wasp has brought the caterpillar to the burrow entrance, it leaves it outside briefly while it goes in the burrow and checks to make sure no other creature has occupied it while the wasp was away. Then it goes back out and drags the caterpillar in. However, scientists found that when they moved the caterpillar a short distance away from the burrow while the wasp was busy checking it, the wasp would come out, drag the caterpillar back to the burrow entrance, and then *check the burrow again,* even though obviously not enough time had passed for any other creature to sneak in. The scientists were able to do this dozens of times in a row, and every time the wasp brought the caterpillar back to the entrance and then wasted its time checking the burrow again. The wasp, it seems, was acting entirely on an inflexible 'script' that involved following up 'bring caterpillar to burrow entrance' with 'check burrow for invaders', and being forced to move the caterpillar again (even a relatively short distance) was resetting this 'script'. No creature acting on a *theory* about the state of the world (such as whether the burrow is occupied) would make this sort of mistake. We refer to the wasp's actions (and behavior like it) as 'tropistic', that is to say, occurring unthinkingly in a certain way. More abstractly, I propose the following as a conceptual generalized test of sentience, which I refer to as the 'food button test': Put a creature in a cage. Put an electrical button in the cage such that, when the button is pressed, a piece of the creature's favorite food is automatically dropped into the cage. (Keep in mind that the button itself is unlike anything the creature normally encounters in nature that is associated with accessing food.) What will the creature do? A tropistic creature, like the wasp, may accidentally bump into the button (and subsequently devour the food), but because its 'script' doesn't involve buttons, it will never *deliberately* go back and press the button when it's hungry. However, a *sentient* creature is able to perceive the button, and after accidentally bumping into it at first, it notices the association between the moment the button is pressed and the moment when food is dropped into the cage, and develops a theory that the former might be causing the latter. Even if it's uncertain at first whether there's a connection, after repeated successful tries it will learn to go back and press the button every time it's hungry. Its ability to actually think and learn about the button (even though the button is unlike anything it encounters in nature) sets it apart from a creature that merely follows a 'script'. (It may be useful to note that learning to escape a maze is a very similar task to learning to press a food button.) So, to rephrase the second part of your question, we can say: Which animals could, at least in principle, solve an appropriately constructed food button test? Well, we still don't *entirely* know, but we can make some pretty good educated guesses. Just about all mammals, with the possible exception of the [naked mole rat,]( have little difficulty solving the test, or otherwise exhibit behavior from which we can assume that they would easily pass the test. The same goes for basically all birds, most or all reptiles, and at least some amphibians and fish. On the other hand, *almost no* invertebrates display this sort of cognitive capacity. All insects, all crustaceans, all snails and slugs and clams and jellyfish, they all seem to act entirely on 'scripts', like the wasp. Even the complex behavior of ants and bees is the cumulative effect of hundreds of interacting individuals, each of which *on its own* behaves unthinkingly and entirely on reflex. The notable exceptions are the coleoid cephalopods- that is, octopuses, squids and cuttlefish- which display high intelligence and easily pass the test. The one other *possible* exception is the portia spider, a tropical hunting spider that eats other spiders of many different species and seems to exhibit on-the-fly learning abilities absent from other arthropods. As for what, in a neurological or algorithmic sense, distinguishes sentience and consciousness from tropism, sadly we still don't know. Figuring this out would be a huge benefit to the progress in what is known as 'strong artificial intelligence', that is to say, writing computer programs that can not only solve problems effectively, but can adapt to new types of problems they weren't explicitly designed for. To put it another way, we already know how to write programs that act like a wasp, but we still don't know how to write programs that act like a bird or an octopus (much less a human).

  • Savanna Wolf Reply

    Hey there Kevin! *Puts on critiquing hat* Let's see what we have here. :) * **Headline**: "Save time testing. Learn how easy WebdriverIO makes automation." Okay, so you went with the main benefit people will get from following your course. That's a very sensible strategy, but you might want to get into the specifics of it. Most products of that kind have the same benefits: make more money, save more time, etc. If you state them as such, they sound a bit generic and you're not giving the reader enough to chew on to make them want to read what comes next. So how do you get more specific? Well, you could tell them *how much* time they're going to save. But that's just one thing. Maybe they'd also be interested in learning to do it *fast*, and telling them how fast they can learn this new skill will convince them to keep reading. Maybe they're interested in the longer term impact of what they're going to learn, or how it will improve their likelihood to get a better job, etc. TL;DR: You can probably pack a lot more value in the headline by a) making the benefits more specific b) adding other benefits. * **Copy blurb**: I like the "pain" angle you've taken in the paragraph, but I'm just concerned about the length. You could try a more condensed version, using bullet points, and get the same point accros. E.g. "Forget the excruciating pain of manual testing AND the nightmares of setting up test automation / No confusing XML config files. Everything in JavaScript. / Speed up your testing, improve the quality of your software, and please your customers and coworkers." (those may *not* be the right benefits to emphasize, I don't know what developers care the most about in this situation). * **Overall hero section impression**: My guess would be that the first impression people will have is that there's too much text. Now, the text isn't actually very long, the paragraphs are short, and they're pretty clear. But I think you could get to the point faster with a Headline / Subheadline / Bullets layout here. I also wouldn't hide the video behind a call to action. Put it where you have the little robot (you could still use the robot image as a video). * **Second section**: "Save Time. Save Effort. Learn WebdriverIO." Okay, so, much like the headline, this could be clearer, more specific. How much time? How much effort? There are many ways you can make that subheading more interesting. Can you maybe give a particularly striking example of the time someone's able to save when they use WebdriverIO? A testimonial from someone who used it and expressed the benefits concisely? Maybe someone who got early access to your course and can give a testimonial? * **3 Benefits**: Okay, I guess the benefits are interesting, but you might want to tie them to the deeper underlying benefits (save/make money, save time, etc.) and to make them more precise. * **Early bird CTA**: Pretty good idea to have that CTA here, although you could debate whether to reveal the price already or to keep it for later. The sales page rule of thumb is that you only want to address price in certain contexts: a) People are only interested in price and will raise that as an objection very fast, so you have to talk about it b) You've already demonstrated the *value* of the product and contrasted it to that of competing solutions, or the price of *not* buying your product, so you can introduce the price c) Your whole offer is based on a cost leadership strategy and people will be interested in it *because* of the low price. Here you could argue that you haven't yet built the case that the value of the product far outweighs the cost, so you might just want to have the CTA without the price, or just to keep it for later. Keyword here is of course "rule of thumb". :) * **Product modules breakdown**: Good job there, that's definitely something that's often missing from average course sales pages. Something you might want to work on is rewording the titles of the modules so they sound like benefits (a bit like headlines). Take a look at point 12 in [this teardown]( I wrote, for example. It's for a different market, but it's largely applicable to your case. * **Price**: Okay, so here the offer is definitely interesting, and that's probably what matters most. From a marketing point of view, you generally want to have more than one plan to maximise your revenue, but that's obviously dependent on what you're able to offer. Once you've completed the modules you have planned, you might want to "refactor" the content into packages, or maybe present some of the modules as bonuses to sweeten the offer. * **Bio**: Not much to say here, you might want to bump some of your street cred up to the subheading, "Instructor & Senior Front-end Egineer at InVision" because InVision is a pretty well-known and, I believe, respected product, so making that more prominent could help. * **"Free sample"**: "Five minutes is all it takes" isn't a great headline here, and you might want to go with something more obvious like "Get a taste of the course for free" and put a video from the first module or something. * **FAQ**: Always a good idea to have an FAQ. However, you shouldn't hesitate to use it to answer what are essentially "Frequently UNasked Questions". What do I mean by that? Well, they're the questions you'll never hear because the reader had an objection to your product and never bought it, and never went on to ask any actual question. What that means is that you can use the FAQ to answer *sales* objections instead of purely technical ones. For example, you might face people who have already tried WebdriverIO and hated it. Or people who tried to automate testing and failed. So you could have questions like "Why is WebdriverIO different?" "What if I've never done any testing automation?" etc. If those objections are common enough, you might want to promote them to a full chunk of the landing page. Lemme know if that helps. :)

  • Michele Schamberger Reply

    Bird robot: The puppets are led on a tour of an engineer's lab. The engineer makes robots; the tour is led by this robot, the teacher. It teaches the friends about how robots work and the different types of robots and how they can make robots, too. Duck Guy notices that the teacher robot kind of looks like him. The robot suddenly starts shouting about how "ROBOTS CAN BUILD ROBOTS" and turns the puppets into robots, but starts taking their organs out in the process to convert them whilst building circuitboards and metal plates around them. All the other robots in the facility join in, including robots that look like Yellow and Red. The friends suddenly wake up next to the creator of the lab - an actual human being. He tells them how they "fell asleep" on the tour. . Clapperboard: Movie production! This would be a special 30-minute episode. The puppets start by thinking how they could film a movie (after watching another movie) and start planning the movie. The clapperboard comes to life, though, and starts telling them how they should be very careful and very dangerous accidents can happen on a movie set. It then dunks Yellow Guy in oil. It says that what they need is a stunt double! The characters are all duplicated, including the clapperboard. The clapperboards then start preparing the movie. They write out a plot for the characters and put it into a script. We only get to see parts of the script, but it has many movie cliches and bad tropes in it from what can be seen on the screen. Then, they sing about how actors are also required, and every teacher from every episode comes onto the screen. This is where things get bad. Every teacher starts singing their respective song, while the clapperboards just keep on singing THEIR song and setting up character designs, props, etc. And then they decide that *every* actor needs a stunt double. Every one of the teachers is then duplicated and the duplicates start singing the songs too, but out of sync with the originals. It's music hell, if it can even be called music any more. Yellow Guy and Duck Guy run out to get some air, while Red Guy just stands there unimpressed. Outside, Duck Guy and Yellow Guy are intercepted by a police hat teacher. It tells them that they can't just run out of the building, and that they're going to have to be put in jail. Cut back to inside, where one of the clapperboards stops from its routine for a second to tell Red Guy that his friends are in big trouble. Red Guy says that he's sure they'll be fine - they always get out of trouble eventually. The clapperboard says that with his friends gone, they're going to have to be replaced. Which introduces the teacher versions of the Yellow Guy and Duck Guy. They start singing, too. It's too much for the Red Guy; he runs out. Everything starts to flicker, and he realizes that he needs to get out of the teacher world. He calls out for Duck Guy and Yellow Guy. Now, we see that Yellow Guy and Duck Guy are trapped in jail, where the teachers are the jail cell doors and they are teaching Yellow and Duck about crime and the laws. We see that in the jail is a million other different colored Red Guys, Yellow Guys, and Duck Guys, all being taught about the law for eternity. Duck Guy tries to find a way to escape, but literally everything is a teacher and won't let him. Red Guy realizes that they must be in the jail and runs to the town jail. Where he finds a sea of different colored puppets, some colored frighteningly similar to his own friends. He tries to figure out which cell HIS friends are in, but can't get anywhere. The halls are literally infinite. Yellow Guy hears Red Guy calling and tries to call back, but is muffled by one of the teachers. Then a camera teacher sees Red Guy and locks him in the cell. Suddenly, Red Guy, Duck Guy and Yellow Guy are reunited! After a fun and cute moment with them together, they are interrupted by the teachers, who lead them around the jail showing different rules. Red Guy spots an exit to the building and runs for it, and his friends quickly follow. Duck Guy isn't fast enough, though, and gets caught by a clock teacher, similar to Tony. In the most cliche of ways, he says "Go on without me!" The Yellow Guy insists he can't leave Duck Guy behind, and runs after Duck Guy. They start to age, but Yellow Guy pulls Duck Guy off of the clock teacher in the nick of time. They run and get into Roy's console room. Suddenly, they see Roy behind them with Colin the Computer and Sketchbook. Sketchbook laughs, "Did you really think you could get away?" Suddenly, there's a flash and the three puppets are back where they started; watching a movie. . Horse: I have no idea it's 11 o clock and I just finished writing that stupid movie plot I'll probably do something with this tomorrow

  • Reymundo Reilly Reply

    Greetings fellow nightmarer! 1 - You are not prepared! No really... Nightmare is something else... I'll try to answer your questions and give you a brief overview of what's to come afterwards. First, I play on iOS. I know medals are scarce at best... I haven't payed for a gold pass, I only removed adds. The medal cost for a fully leveled character that has gotten 1 level in a job after its reset is 70 and 119 for a full set afterwards so +1 for each mastered job... Next, ship structures seem a bit weird as when I restarted (I had sooooo many structures I got bored of selling them) some of them were at 1 and others had weird numbers like 2-3-4... But not on the ones I had kept a bunch of... Ex: the guardian armour was at 1 but lucky bird was at 2 and I'm sure I kept more armours because birds sold for a lot of points... As for your final question, I didn't take any chances and removed all gear! So I can't say for certain what happens if you don't remove it beforehand... 2 - You are not prepared!! You want to do a hard mode run first... This is what happened to me: I started nightmare after beating normal, getting a bunch of gear and having played 300 hours. Started the nightmare game and got wrecked... Pretty badly too! I haven't beaten nightmare yet but I have progressed pretty far now. I'm at the Pirate seas! So what I did was design a team around these simple facts: - Monsters in nightmare are faster than you (like all the time, even a robot, tycoon, etc are slower) - They pierce your line (always hitting the front and 2nd row) - They are able to hit from any of their row (except for humanoids who are limited to humanoid behaviour, such as gunners hitting from all rows but swordsmen only from the first row) - They have massive health and damage output! Massive I say!! By the 7th island in Euripitan they will be hitting for around 1k-2k each... 8 monsters hitting before your team can attack once... That's between 5k to 10k... Yup! On your front line and 2nd line. Their damage does not drop... They are truly nightmarish! My solution? It might not be perfect but it's worked so far... I did not want to accumulate 1k medals from daily logins and weekly bounties... So I captured the people I needed beforehand (dancers, gunmen, vikings etc.) made sure I could rehire all of them (they cost between 20 to 35 depending on how many jobs they had mastered when I captured them) I only got those that I needed to fill the 8 slots of the fighting team! Keep in mind your captain can be any class if you have unlocked it on your replay file! Use the overpowered Fairy Shield on front vikings (their final job is either robot or fencer, 15% block or slash!!) and 2nd row gunmen (robots or fiends or sumos). They basically gain unlimited MP and can spam heals and damage skills! Dancers at the back with whatever you prefer, bows or monkey guns... I use monkeys as at the very least they gain more MP per shot (I know it says 5 but they seem to gain 9 per shot with the monkey guns)... If possible try to get as many smith tickets as possible! 200+ is a good idea! And make sure you've unlocked the 990 item slots and have filled them with power ups! Also be certain to have a metric ton of books (yup those things that give knowledge cause your front and second row team need to master as many jobs as possible before getting to island 4-5!!) I would think that is about it... Sorry for the long post but I sure hope this helps you! Good luck and welcome to nightmare!!

  • Ward Tremblay Reply

    > Awareness usually or at least often consists in thoughts. I am not taking a dualist position. It might actually be closer to idealist, but even still, both are irrelevant positions to my argument. I make no claims about what is real or not. I make only claims about subjective experience, things you can experience. There are thoughts that you are aware of, say the "awareness of the bird". I make no claims about what lies outside awareness. Are there thoughts that occur outside awareness? Is there even a bird or an external world that exists outside awareness? I don't know, and CANNOT know. All I know is what I experience. The things that I experience, the sight of the bird, and thoughts, and qualia I define as conscious objects. The awareness of these conscious objects is consciousness. Perhaps there is a "sight of the bird" that I don't experience, or "qualia" that exist outside of my bubble of consciousness. Who knows. I make no claims about what is outside. I am effectively blind there. And the only person who can prove to you that you experience things is yourself, through your own subjective experience. If you can experience things, then you have consciousness, since I define consciousness to be subjective experience. > Why do some things have consciousness but others (apparently) do not? You are taking a physicalist point of view. A better question to ask is, how does consciousness give rise to reality? Why does reality seem to follow some consistent set of rules, i.e. physics? Does reality even exist? Yet it seems to be that reality is real and exists outside my mind because it is consistent, and follows a sort of common sense sometimes, and YET, that can never CERTAINLY be known. I think reality is the stranger phenomenon here, not consciousness. > What is awareness? It's what you have that a robot, supposedly, doesn't have. Or a rock. Or, if EVERYTHING has consciousness, well that's okay too. You should still know what consciousness is, your experience exists because you experience things. The experiencing is the awareness. > What is a thought if it is not awareness? A thought is something you are aware of. To repeat my statement above, maybe there are thoughts that lie outside awareness. Who knows. > What is the relationship between your consciousness and your body? What happens when your body dies? What is your position on souls? Can you give an account of how consciousness works or is it reasonable to think such an account can ever be given if your theory is correct? I make no assertions for any of these questions, and they are irrelevant to my argument. But to entertain the idea, if I make the metaphysical assumption "reality exists", then my conception of how reality works seems to give rise to there not being a soul, and the death of the body is the death of consciousness. I cannot answer that last question, which is the so called "hard" problem of consciousness.

  • Velda Buckridge Reply

    INT Paddy's Pub Frank: [Walks in with Dennis looking at his smartphone] I'm voting for Trump! Can't stump the Trump! I'm gonna retweet him right now! Dennis: Retweet what Frank? Frank: I'm gonna retweet Trump! Dennis: I don't think you know how Twitter works. You have to find a tweet you like and then you retweet the tweet. Frank: Sounds like too much work. Dennis: No, dude. Give me the phone. See... you go to Donald Trump's Twitter account and, oh... look here. He says "Maybe Vince McMahon should be my running mate." Do you want to retweet that? Mac:[from behind bar] Oh shit yeah! Vince McMahon would be an awesome VP. Maybe Hulk Hogan could be Secretary of Defense. Dennis: Mac, how would Hulk Hogan be able to defend the country from terrorists? I mean, I'm a fan of the Hulkster and model my own personal training regimen off his tour de force autobiography "My Life Outside the Ring," but clearly Jesse Ventura is the man for the job. Mac: But Hulk is the Real American that fights for the rights of every man. Dennis: Mmmm true... but does he fight Predators? Mac: Good point. Dennis: You see... this is the problem with society. Its... it's not that people are stupid. It's that we put stupid people in charge. Frank: Are you calling Trump stupid! You think you're so smart, you try and stump'em! Dennis: Trump is an economic genius, for sure. He should be the Secretary of Treasury, no doubt. Deck out the Fed with some more gold an marble and throw in a jacuzzi... never mind that. What I'm saying is that we should pick people in government based on their expertise. Charlie: [walks in from the back room] I think a robot should be president. Dennis: Too cold and calculating, but I think you're onto something. We should make the guys who MAKE robots the president. Those guys are smart as shit! Frank: A technocracy! Charlie: I don't that's a real word. Dennis: Charlie, since when are you an authority on real words? I heard you just this morning call a toilet plunger a blooblegorp. Charlie: That's the sound it makes! Frank: Naah... a techocracy! A bunch of smart guys in lab coats runnin' around makin' laws. Dennis: I'm all on this! Let's start a technocracy! Who's our guy? We need to get someone _REALLY_ smart. We've got to put our best foot forward. Charlie: Yeah, like Allen Einstein. That guy makes the sickest robots. He made one that poops M&Ms and another one that looks like a bird that's always drinking water. Dennis: Allen Einstein? Charlie. Those aren't even robots. Mac: Who was the guy that made Nintendo? That's our guy. Frank: Pretty sure Mr. Nintendo is a Jappo. Dennis: OK, I got it! Remmeber Professor Pippette! Mac: Yeah, the Saturday morning cartoons guy that talks about science and shit. I never watched the show, but he did sound super smart. Dennis: We should get Professor Pippette elected president! [The Gang Starts A Technocracy!]

  • Dejah Armstrong Reply

    You can literally play the whole game without a single fight, and you can also play the whole game like a Diablo clone, and any combination of the two. It's literally only limited by how flexible the person playing the DM is. I am currently DMing a campaign that is basically a bunch of scumfucks trying to take over a city by building a criminal empire from the ground up. The scumfucks are a burly alcoholic gladiator, a lesbian assassin who works out of a brothel, the chosen mortal emissary of the god of death and a weird pansexual quasi-demon nobleman. All of this in a fantasy early Roman empire type setting. They're currently exploiting a crackdown on crime to get rid of their competition and expand their criminal network, as they work their way into the riches they need to actually run for political office. Meanwhile I'm also playing in a campaign where the whole group is your typical fantasy good guys, and I am the only scumfuck pretending to be good so the party will help me out. The DM knows and plays along, as we've basically already decided that the end of the campaign will be me drawing a line in the sand and making them either join me or die/kill me. Which is fucking awesome because I love those kind of twists. I've also played other similar games with similarly weird characters and consequently stories: * A barbarian who fell in love with a cow, then with a werewolf woman who gave him a daughter, and the curse of the werewolf, which, turns out, *is* a VD. * A bard, who committed a murder to escape jail after being wrongfully imprisoned for murder, who accidentally magically charmed the pants off a deaf-mute barbarian girl, while being betrothed to a girl in the city he left behind. * A paladin whose god died in front of him, and left a shard of his soul embedded in him, making him the last of his followers able to actually perform miracles. * A Vampire detective raised in Campone's Chicago who lived on to the present day, detecting still. * A pirate who made up his own reputation and ended up having an actual bounty on his head despite the lack of actual crimes. * A bird-girl with split personalities who sings for money and has gotten her brother killed in an attempt to gain fame and fortune. * A Rabbi who had built a huge humanoid robot whom he controlled through a transmitter under his hat, who gave up his life as a superhero after accidentally throwing a car through two stories of a building, thankfully injuring nobody. * A doctor who developed magical healing powers after his patients kept dying due to a weird post-apocalyptic curse, leading him to literally stare into the abyss. And many more who don't quite make the cut for the list but were still awesome to see grow and evolve through their respective stories. If you never played a pen and paper RPG, do yourself a favour and do so.

  • Emile Walsh Reply

    >I suppose that a proof brings new knowledge, where a brute force method, in essence, doesn't. But i can't shake the feeling that a proof is really a method of reducing the number of logically valid options to be brute-force'd down to just one. It is still brute force, it has just discovered the practical use of a until then unknown or over-looked fact that disqualifies all options but one. Is this sorta right? Not exactly. Think of it this way, if I make a statement like "If thing X is not a robot, but it is a dog, then X is also a mammal", then a math-style proof could be to take a dog who isn't a mammal, and then show that it must not be a dog either (proof by contradiction). You, however, don't show this in a brute force way by proving that a dog isn't a bacteria, isn't a bird, etc. The difference is that the math proof will rely on the fundamental essence of what a mammal is, and what a dog is, and the relationship between those two. In doing so, you learn about that relationship. If you simply prove that a dog isn't anything besides a mammal, you run into the philosophical problem of whether there's maybe other kinds of animals (or entities in general, really), and maybe dogs are actually some alien lifeforms that we don't know about yet. However, relying directly on what a mammal is and what a dog is, and then using the relationship between the two as your proof, that's good mathematics. Which is why brute force proofs are so controversial- is it good enough to be true, or should you know why something is true before declaring it proved? Actually, just to add a bit, in more challenging proofs, you'll almost always find that there is a specific "magic step" that makes the really interesting part of the proof, whereas the rest is either just setting up the logical circumstances for the magic step, or trying to unpack the ramifications of that step. People love Cantor's Diagonal Proof, but generally all you see is the magic step, which is the demonstration of how to find a number that cannot be in a countably infinitely long list. The magic of such a proof is that that one step defines the whole thing, and that "magic step" is what mathematicians are looking for, and that is what's missing here. In this proof, there is no magic step, so there's no real wisdom being gained.

  • Kaley Smith Reply

    Dear Santa, Thanks for the BB gas gun. I did like you said and aimed for the birds. Love, Tim ***** Dear Tim, I’m so happy you’re enjoying your new toy, and are putting it to good use. Remember, birds are all winged rats—even the colorful ones! We’ve had an increase in ninja sword requests this year, and I have one here with your name on it! If you thought the gun did wonders for our bird problem, wait till you see what this thing can do. Keep well, Santa ***** Dear Santa, Thanks for the cool sword, but mom says I’m not allowed to keep it anymore. She’s making me go to some guy called therapist. He’s okay, I guess, but his room smells like feet. This year, I was wondering if I could get a new mom? I want to visit this one still, but only on mother’s day (dad says I must). Love, Tim ***** Dear Tim, I’ll see what I can do about your mom. Here are some fireworks to pass the time. Love, Santa ***** Dear Santa, Mom broke her jaw in an accident. Her mouth is wired shut and she looks like a robot. Can you make her better? Her face is all blue, and she looks sad all the time. I also don’t want a new one anymore. I was just mad about the sword. Mom’s actually really nice. Also, I left the fireworks on the porch by accident, and they got wet. Sorry. Love, Tim ***** Dear Tim, How’d you like a real gun instead? The elves and I decided to join a more profitable market. Love, Santa ***** Dear Santa, Therapist says I shouldn’t talk to you anymore. Mommy found the letters, and said she’s going to call the police. I thought I’d let you know because you gave me the cool gas gun. Mom took that away too though, but it’s okay, I didn’t like hurting the birds anyway. Anyway, thanks for all the stuff. Hope all of you don’t go to jail like mommy says, so someone’s there to feed the reindeer. Love, Tim.

  • Baby Gulgowski Reply

    Should they be able to pass laws on how much water pressure firemen can use? What type of material their suits should be made out of? How fast their ambulances are allowed to travel? Imagine if politicians decided that fire was a natural part of society, and they should burn out themselves. Then proceeded to enact laws that all fire engines must travel no more than 3mph, that they aren't allowed to use sirens or car horns, that only one fire fighter may be present in vehicle at all times, exceptions being those who have black belts? Ooor if they don't arrive within five minutes they must allow the fire to take its course, they may only use axes made of plastic, or no men over the height of 5'7" can operate the hose unless he has a masters degree in theology, and their uniforms must consist of at *least* three of the following items: * crocs * large novelty sunglasses * felt alligator mask * leather turtleneck * clown shoes * cardboard robot head * spongebob underwear * inside out tuxedo * 6" stilettos * small african bird in a backpack * elbow-length rubber gloves * pipe cleaners glued to the eyelids * red silken bath robe * green bowling ball * scarf made out of duct tape * 18 carat diamond ring And any fire dept. unable to follow these rules will be shut down. Or maybe we should let the firefighters make these decisions?